Reactive and Proactive Service: What's the Difference?

There is no right or wrong way to serve. I do think some slaves are more prone to reactive service and there are some slaves who are more proactive.

You Aren't Doing It Right - Dealing With Criticism From Others

So what I'd like you to take from this is that when you give advice, keep it open minded. It is possible to learn a new way to do something that you never though possible. Everyone has a unique take on their life and their love of BDSM and D/s.

Orgasm Control: Learning How to Ask for an Orgasm

In D/s sexuality one of the more common rules is that the Dominant controls the orgasms and sexual release of the submissive. Some require that the submissive not even touch themselves without the say so of the Dominant. In this style of power exchange it is familiar territory that the submissive will learn how to ask for an orgasm whether in or outside of a scene.

Some Thoughts on Domestic Service from a Male Submissive

When luna indicated that she was going to emphasize domestic service at the Sub Guide this month, it reminded me that when I tell people I am primarily a service submissive I am frequently asked: “What is that?”. The follow-up question is often, “What do you get out of that?” It seemed an opportune time to tackle these questions. (Sometimes the follow-up question is “What are you secondarily, then?” To which I always reply, “Whatever She needs me to be, of course.”)

So what is a service submissive? Simply put, it’s a sub (male or female) that takes care of household chores and similar tasks. Cooking, cleaning and other domestic duties might be performed by a service submissive. We essentially take the role of butler, maid, chauffeur, gardener or cook.

Your Right to Choose-Feminism and the Lifestyle

I know that being a feminist means different things to different people. To me, feminism has always been about having the right to choose to lead the kind of life that I want to.

Domifriends: The Best of Both Worlds

In the Vanilla World, we refer to boyfriends and girlfriends and everyone understands what we’re talking about. If you’re not in a public D/s relationship, describing your Dom/me can be a bit challenging.

A Mental Predicament: Balancing Wants and Needs

The transition to 24/7 D/s turned out to be much more challenging for us.

Mending Old Relationship Scars to Open Up to New Things

How can I get past the barrier of old scars to let my Husband who wants to become a dominant train me to be His submissive?

Dealing with Guilt as a Submissive

When it comes to dealing with guilt, you have to talk about it. You can’t just shove it somewhere deep inside and expect that to take care of everything. Neither can you throw yourself into an activity and consider it done. You have to talk it out with the person, no matter how difficult that may be.