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Content related to "Going to the Doctor with Kink-Related Marks or Bruises"

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Limits

Limits are personal boundaries that everyone places for how far they are willing to take things. These limits can be sexual, personal, emotional or otherwise. You may even have some for your every day that you don’t realize are limits. If you don’t have any BDSM experience, the idea of setting up limits can be challenging. Let’s dive into what they are, how to figure them out and why you make sure they are respected.

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Lessons in Submissive Speech

Not long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.

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BDSM vs Abuse

The core of BDSM is consent. No one will disagree with this. We are all aware, hopefully, that abuse is not consensual. If you feel that what is going on is ‘not right’ then you certainly should investigate if it is abuse or not. Some of what you may feel could not be abuse at all, but it’s good to know for sure. Learn how you can see the differences for yourself.

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Caring for Yourself After a Scene: Self-Aftercare

All too often it becomes a necessity to take care of yourself after a play session because your top was just visiting or the play party is over. Even after a few days you may need to carry out some aftercare. Knowing what to do can prevent physical and emotional struggles.

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The 6 Most Common STDs

Everytime we talk about sex and sexually related activities such as many of the BDSM and kinky play we do it's important, if not imperative, that we are safe and aware of the most common sexually transmitted diseases and infections you can get. You should have tests for STDs regularly if you choose to have multiple partners, or if you are changing partners. Maintaining a clean bill of sexual health will provide yourself and your partner(s) with reassurance and safety. Even though you may be disease free does not mean you shouldn't practice safe sex. If you need a refresher, check the previous post on safer kinky sex practices.

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First Aid for Bruises, Abrasions and Other After Play Marks

Caring for them is part of the aftercare we have set up for me. We are pretty minimal when it comes to first aid for them because I like to keep them as long as possible. But not everyone is like that. First Aid is important in the immediate aftercare of play.

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After the Scene is Over - Clean-up, Aftercare, and Check-Ins

Submissive Guide has a lot of resources on clean up, aftercare and check-ins that get lost in the archives. I've pulled together what I have here, as well as all over the web to make this a comprehensive post for all things "after the scene". Bookmark it, share it, use it.

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How Can You Reduce the Appearance of Marks and Bruises After Play?

I work in a very conservative environment, so we try to keep marks to places that can easily be covered. That doesn’t always work and it limits our play field greatly in the warmer months because I live in a hellishly humid place in summer. Any suggestions?

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Exploring Hormone Junkies: Part 3 - Testosterone

Peel back the reasons behind being obstinate and competitive and generally you end up with a whole lot of testosterone.

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We Do Not Out Each Other: Protecting People's Privacy

Protecting each other's privacy is so important. We don't out each other. We just don't.

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