This is another entry into the self-mentoring series here on Submissive Guide. If your recall back in the first post about solo coaching I asked you and tasked you to start holding private coaching sessions with yourself. Hopefully, you have kept up with these and have earmarked a few challenges in your life that might need some work.
Today I'm going to cover a coaching model that I learned about that will work quite well for our submissive journey. It's called the CREATE model. The CREATE system is a model that when used will ensure you stay on track. It comprises the following steps:
- Challenge and create
- Reframe and replace your negative thinking
- Engage and energize
- Act and award
- Tools and techniques
- Explore and evaluate
Challenge and create
What challenges do you have in your life? If you've been holding coaching sessions with yourself you will likely have discovered a few areas that might need work. If you haven't done the previous assignment, sit down right now and identify at least one challenge in your life - debt, disorganized relationship, lack of education or expertise in an area, time management - at lease be able to tell yourself the truth. Once you own up to your struggles in life they become easier to tackle. Take each challenge and ask yourself, "If I had to create a new experience for this part of my life, what would it look like?" Make a list of your new, more positive outcomes.
Reframe and replace your negative thinking
Remaining negative about your thoughts will get you nowhere. Begin reframing and replacing your negative thoughts and beliefs. If you hear yourself saying, "Oh, I'll never be a good enough submissive." Stop those thoughts and ask yourself if they are leading you in a negative way or a positive way. If the answer is negative you need to convince yourself of the opposite. Make a list of all the reasons why you would make a good submissive and repeat them to yourself regularly.
Engage and energize
Life is too short for you to wait until it stops being shitty to really enjoy it. That means no excuses. Get out there and enjoy yourself now. You can't just sit around and expect your life to correct itself or for you to instantly find a perfect partner. Go engage in life and enjoy yourself now, right where you are, you'll become energized and so will your life.
Act and award
One of the most powerful things I have done to turn my submissive life into something I revel in was to act no matter how I was feeling. When I felt depressed or less than submissive I still made a point of doing something that would feel submissive and feed my need to submit. That one thing leads to another and another. Once you get into the habit of taking action no matter what you can start rewarding yourself. Don't let your progress go unacknowledged. What action don't you feel like taking right now, that you could start on right away? Spend the next 10 minutes taking a stab at it.
Tools and techniques
Some of the most organized submissives and slaves I know have toolkits for service. They have things in a central location that can help them with the regular tasks to perform no matter what they are. Your toolkit is a valuable resource in your journey to becoming your best life coach and submissive. I hope by now that you've realized the importance of having a journal in your possession. Add it to your toolkit. Other items could be inspirational quotes or books that lift you up, self-help books and resources for the challenges you have identified in your life a special time set aside every day for your private sessions and perhaps a supportive person or two. Make a list of your life tools in your journal and use them regularly.
Explore and evaluate
The submissive journey you are on is a chance to explore and experience life as an adventure. You'll gain the most satisfaction from the journey itself. As you explore make sure you are consciously evaluating yourself, ask yourself questions, monitor your progress, record your achievements and make observations. Make sure you are an active partner in your life and not just an observer.
Hopefully I've given you a model that you can use to help you through any challenge that may come your way but most importantly to teach you that being submissive is not a spectator sport. You need to get your hands dirty, you need to take charge of your life and make sure that it is leading in the direction of your dreams. Don't leave it up to someone else to do for you. Sit down right now and coach yourself to a better submissive life.
Next month we'll talk about tackling those negative thoughts and beliefs that we hear as a record in our head that knocks us down and keeps us from striving for the sky. I look forward to talking with you then.