BDSM checklists all live under different names. You can call them limit lists, negotiation lists, negotiation checklists and perhaps ones I've never heard. They are all based on a similar idea. If you make a list of the things you enjoy or don't enjoy you can easily share them with the person you want to play with to find out if you can build a scene that will satisfy both of your needs and desires.
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Do dominant women like this, that or the other thing? Unfortunately, there is no one set of ideal submissive traits that can be emulated. Indeed, if you ask these questions of twenty different Dominas, you’ll get at least twenty different answers. Each Dominant has her own idea of what makes a perfect submissive or slave. Some like youth and physical fitness, others like maturity and experience, tall or short, eloquent or not-so-much, pain slut or light-weight, sissy or not, emotive or the strong/silent type… well, as you can imagine, that list goes on and on. The problem, as I see it, is that too many (prospective) submissives get bogged down in trivial matters when they should be focusing on simple truth and sincerity.
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Scheduling your time, prioritizing your goals, and optimizing your day, are highly personal pursuits, and more of a subjective art than a universal science.
Read The Article | Find SimilarApplying mentoring to a BDSM context a mentor is someone that guides and advises a newbie on what to expect, things they might want learn and other items. I believe a mentor should be on the same level as you. There are many opinions out there, but common sense advice can be found in the following series of articles about mentors.
Read The Series | Find SimilarI’ve been developing a submissive code of ethics for myself to help give me long term goals and a focus. I feel it will bring about change in me that perhaps I can’t see yet. I thought I would share it here so that you can perhaps get some ideas for developing your own code of ethics.
Read The Article | Find SimilarIf your only view of BDSM is the online community then you could believe that BDSM and being kinky is a huge playground and that a lot of people participate in it openly. And you’d be wrong. While a a good portion of the US population admits they are kinky (10% according to NCSF) most of those are not going to participate in a BDSM community or step further than silk blindfolds and light bondage.
Read The Article | Find SimilarWhy should you attend a munch? This is often the first step in exploring the BDSM lifestyle in real life, rather than online. You can meet people, make contacts, ask questions, and just enjoy your time out without worrying about keeping your secret desires secret any longer. This is most often the place where cross dressers can ‘come out’, so to speak, and appear in make up and outfits that reflect their lifestyle, without negative comments.
Read The Article | Find SimilarWhen was the last time you saw an adult dressed up as a naughty school girl, nurse, biker or mad scientist? Why Halloween parties most likely! Did you ever stop to think about whether that person was just dressing in costume or portraying a playful kink of theirs? Sure we hear on the news of yet another young couple walking onto a public bus collared and leashed but most of us don't let your kinks out in public.
Read The Article | Find SimilarThere are many ways to take notes and everyone has a preferred method. Let me teach you my note-taking method that I have developed over the years.
Read The Article | Find SimilarAmbrosio brings us a series of posts on Leather protocol and etiquette. In this introductory post, we touch on the very basics of manners and appropriate behavior in BDSM situations.
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