Sample Dominant/submissive Contract

The first of three contract examples from Mrs. Darling. This one is from her book, retelling her own submissive discovery tale, Darling Discovered. Feel free to use this contract as a template for what will or will not work for your relationship.

10 Tips to Make Moving In With Your Dominant (or vise-versa) Smooth and Easy

Many of the things we do when it comes to BDSM and D/s relationships seem to come faster than in a traditional relationship, so often we forget that the base of a D/s relationship is a traditional one. You are still two people that plan to cohabitate. With that comes decisions and plans, change and adjustment periods.

In the first list of tips, I want to give I'm going to cover the more basic 'vanilla' ideas that will make your submissive more comfortable as they move into your home. The second list is BDSM based tips that will hopefully start your relationship on a good footing now that you are living under the same roof.

Using Ritual to Maintain and Define Power Exchange

No matter how you view your life, rituals can help define the power structures we choose for our relationships. Rituals can enrich power exchange by giving reinforcement, regularity, and depth to relationships in a unique and beautiful way.

Some Thoughts on Domestic Service from a Male Submissive

When luna indicated that she was going to emphasize domestic service at the Sub Guide this month, it reminded me that when I tell people I am primarily a service submissive I am frequently asked: “What is that?”. The follow-up question is often, “What do you get out of that?” It seemed an opportune time to tackle these questions. (Sometimes the follow-up question is “What are you secondarily, then?” To which I always reply, “Whatever She needs me to be, of course.”)

So what is a service submissive? Simply put, it’s a sub (male or female) that takes care of household chores and similar tasks. Cooking, cleaning and other domestic duties might be performed by a service submissive. We essentially take the role of butler, maid, chauffeur, gardener or cook.

Is It Healthy to Do Humiliation as Punishment?

So how would they know when the humiliation is damaging you? Is it possible to use humiliation as a punishment without damaging a sub's self-esteem or is it best reserved strictly for play alone & nothing more?

Accepting Fear through Obedience

I hope I always fear You. I hope You always keep me one step away from being comfortable and complacent.

RACK: The Risk Acceptable Safety Mantra

Understanding the differences of RACK and SSC can help you decide if your preference for activities is more for one mantra or another.