7 Things I Wish I'd Known When I Was New to BDSM

There is always time for a bit of education and knowledge before exploration. It can keep you safe, it can make you more aware, it can keep you safe and it can be fun. What 7 things did I learn that I wish I had known a LONG time ago?

When Fantasy Collides with Reality: Weighing Expectations when Exploring Kink Fantasies

Unrealistic expectations and desires are some of the most difficult challenges faced by those who are experienced in the lifestyle when dealing with those just entering the lifestyle. In many ways we each buy into a particular ‘aspect’ of the fantasy. Yet over and over people try to implement the impossible.

Some Thoughts on Domestic Service from a Male Submissive

When luna indicated that she was going to emphasize domestic service at the Sub Guide this month, it reminded me that when I tell people I am primarily a service submissive I am frequently asked: “What is that?”. The follow-up question is often, “What do you get out of that?” It seemed an opportune time to tackle these questions. (Sometimes the follow-up question is “What are you secondarily, then?” To which I always reply, “Whatever She needs me to be, of course.”)

So what is a service submissive? Simply put, it’s a sub (male or female) that takes care of household chores and similar tasks. Cooking, cleaning and other domestic duties might be performed by a service submissive. We essentially take the role of butler, maid, chauffeur, gardener or cook.

Emotional Dependency in D/s Relationships

This necessary attachment can develop into a positive reinforcing factor in the relationship or it can lead to a one-sided worship of one of the partners that can fracture the foundation.

Where Do I Start in BDSM?

It's an overwhelming feeling when you are facing a world of new information. It can be difficult when you have so many questions and blanks in your mind but give me a moment to explain how you can begin to fill in the void.

Fictional Stories of Male Submission

I have read several hundred fictional stories of male submission and here are my favorite stories and authors in no particular order.

Cyber Realities: Online and Long Distance Relationship Thoughts

Mistress Steel's thoughts on cyber submission and kink.

31 Days To Better Domestic Service: FLYing with FlyLady.net

Flylady can help you learn how to make cleaning a fun routine! Get dressed to your shoes and shine your sink, just to get started on the way.

Coping with Release: The End of the D/s Relationship

How do you process the end of a D/s relationship? Explore the range of emotions and how you can reach closure.

31 Days of Submissive Journaling – Day 7: Selecting a Physical Journal

How do you know what kind of journal will suit you best? Figure out what you need to have to make your journaling experience pleasant. I've done all the legwork for you.