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Content related to "Limits: Drawing That Line In The Sand"

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The Challenge of Learning Anticipatory Service: Making Mistakes

At the furthest reaches of proactive service resides “anticipatory service.” There are many challenges faced by servants who aspire towards successful anticipatory service.

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7 Things I Wish I'd Known When I Was New to BDSM

There is always time for a bit of education and knowledge before exploration. It can keep you safe, it can make you more aware, it can keep you safe and it can be fun. What 7 things did I learn that I wish I had known a LONG time ago?

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Setting Goals

No matter how you go about it, setting realistic goals and then working towards success is a step by step process. You have the tools available to make changes in your life if you want them. It doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Treat them like anything else in your life worth doing and you can make it. Use the resources below to make the progress stick.

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Submissive and Slave: A Personal View

Some say the difference between a submissive and a slave has nothing whatever to do with how much control one gives up or how submissive one is. That it's in one's actions. In the way the slave obeys without question or hesitation. In the respect in the slave's voice when he or she speaks with his or her owner. In the way the slave knows what the owner needs almost before the owner does. But I've known some submissives to show their dominants more respect than some slaves show their owners.

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Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of a Predator Dom/me Part 2

Once you start in training you have a better chance to evaluate your new Dom/me. Is the Dom creating a positive learning environment, or does s/he make you feel that you are constantly failing his/her orders? Was it really a newbie mistake, or is there a lack of training that is causing the failure? Submission can easily set up a feeling of need and dependency on the Dom/me.

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Use Your Safeword Without Guilt - You Are NOT a Bad Sub For Needing It

You never know what may go on, how you will react or where your limits are that day. Using that safeword will protect yourself. But for many of us, wielding that power is scary and one that you don't consider unless it is absolutely necessary. When we do break and need to safeword out of a scene we can be fraught with guilt and feelings of failure.

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This is Not a Game - BDSM is My Life

I feel that there are so many who come into the lifestyle and do not realize what being a slave or submissive really entails. They come into the lifestyle having a certain expectation, a certain fantasy, but once they really get their feet wet, they realize it’s nothing that they expected.

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So You Want to Share Your Kink with Your Vanilla Partner - What You Need to Know

I want my partner to be Dominant/submissive but I’m afraid they’ll judge me or leave me if I tell them.

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Q&A: Subbie Siblings

Most people accent the idea of the term “Subbie Siblings” because, despite differences and nuances within our relationships, we are all interacting with a socially taboo subject.

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How to Ask for What You Need as a Submissive

Don't be afraid to speak up when you need or want something different. You never really stop negotiating in D/s.

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