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Stop Sub Shaming: It’s Not Cool to be Judgy

It’s not cool to sub shame. But, in this world of kink, it’s a very real concern. Here’s how you can identify it and what you should do when your own thoughts lean towards being judgemental instead of open and accepting.

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Stereotyping Submission as Feminine

Does being a submissive inherently mean you are feminine? This, of course, could work in a male Dominant/female submissive dynamic, but then again not always the case. What about relationships where the female is the Dominant? Do they suddenly become masculine?

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5 Types of Power Exchange Relationships

We can however, put every relationship into 5 different relationship types. I'm sure there are more, but for the purpose of this essay, I will be covering the 5 types that I can see in this life. This is not the only way to look at and describe relationships, but it is a good beginning. I am not a relationship expert and what I am writing about is my own observations. If you feel that another definition fits your idea of each relationship type, then by all means, please use your own.

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Acceptance of My Feminist Submissive Identity

I have spent much time pondering the seemingly conflicting views of feminism and submission. In the first part of my article, I would like to discuss feminism and how it fits in with my view of both the BDSM community and submission. In the second part, I will explore how I practice feminism in my personal life.

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Some Thoughts on Domestic Service from a Male Submissive

When luna indicated that she was going to emphasize domestic service at the Sub Guide this month, it reminded me that when I tell people I am primarily a service submissive I am frequently asked: “What is that?”. The follow-up question is often, “What do you get out of that?” It seemed an opportune time to tackle these questions. (Sometimes the follow-up question is “What are you secondarily, then?” To which I always reply, “Whatever She needs me to be, of course.”)

So what is a service submissive? Simply put, it’s a sub (male or female) that takes care of household chores and similar tasks. Cooking, cleaning and other domestic duties might be performed by a service submissive. We essentially take the role of butler, maid, chauffeur, gardener or cook.

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Acronyms, Abbreviations and Initialisms in BDSM Conversation

Oftentimes instead of writing out the words we abbreviate or create acronyms or groups of initials to say the same thing. Here is a list of the more common letter groupings when it comes to talking about BDSM and submission. These could also be seen in profiles and dating sites.

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Male Submission – Foot Fetish

A foot fetish is not necessarily related to submission, although for many guys the two combine well and there are a whole lot of varieties of activities and preferences for guys with a foot fetish.

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Strong and Submissive: Exploring the Phenomenon of Strong Female Submissives

About half of us are like me - powerful energetic women who love to submit. I become even more of the strong woman that I am outside the bedroom, the strong woman who revels both in her strength and in her submission.

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Book Review: Paradigms of Power: Styles of Master/Slave Relationships

Paradigms of Power: Styles of Master/Slave Relationships by Raven Kaldera is a collection of essays written by both masters and slaves who are involved in different types of relationships. Tequilarose provides a critical review.

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Don't Judge A Label By Its Cover: Dispelling Stereotypes of D/s Roles

Personality traits do no indicate what label that person may wear in D/s or BDSM. Learn more ways we apply stereotypes and how to dispel your mistruths.

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