Welcome back to another video post! In the last episode we talked about how to identify what improving your submission needs - a focus. In that video I asked you to make a list of things you feel (or your Dom feels) that need improvement to make your submission better and more fulfilling. If you don't have a direction yet, I suggest you go back and do that activity first.
Out of the list of things you want to focus on, you should pick one that you'd like to focus on first and that will be the one we talk about working on today.
Now that you have a specific goal you need to develop a plan to reach that goal. A plan is a general outline of how you are going to meet small goals leading up to the main goal. So, if we continue with the example of exercising in the morning you could have a plan to build up to 30 mins, starting from 10. You could plan to get up 30 minutes earlier to accommodate your new routine. Each of these mini steps along the way is part of your plan.
Write your plan down. Make sure you keep it somewhere visible to remind you what you want to be doing.
SET TASKS TO STAY WITHIN THE PLAN
The tasks are the steps required to meet the mini goals and ultimately the final goal in your plan. Each part of your plan should have at least 1 task to accomplish it.
In the exercise example, we wanted to get up 30 minutes earlier to accommodate the exercise so for our tasks we will certainly be changing the alarm to reflect the change in schedule. Once the tasks within the plan for a specific mini goal are complete we can move to the next mini goal. Each of these is very important to the success of the overall goal.
REWARD SMALL SUCCESS
Every step in your plan requires a reward for achieving it. It doesn’t have to be something large but you need to feel good about every success, no matter the size. Take for instance, the exercise goal. If one of your mini-goals in your plan was to get up 30 minutes earlier and you succeed in doing so without hitting the snooze for a whole week, then a reward would be helpful in maintaining your progress.
What type of rewards could you have? Well, everyone is different and the rewards that each person sets for themselves will also be varied. Always set rewards that will not undermine your success. So, a reward for getting up 30 minutes early for a week should not be that you get to sleep in the following day.
No matter how you go about it, setting realistic goals and then working towards success is a step by step process. You have the tools available to make changes in your life if you want them. It doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Treat them like anything else in your life worth doing and you can make it.
Set a realistic goal. Write out why you want to achieve the goal and the impact it will have on your life when you attain it. Follow the steps talked about in this article and map out the way to success. Then get started working on the mini-goals in your plan. Keep a record of your progress!
Resources to Help You
- Solo-Coaching Your Way to Better Submission Free Printable
- Setting Goals eCourse
- Goal Setting in a D/s or M/s Relationship