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Content related to "Single in the Scene Part II: Service"

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30 Days of Submission

Every day throughout the month of November 2013 there was a new post from me answering the questions posed in the 30 Days of Submission meme that I’d seen going around. You gain a glimpse into who I am as a submissive and my relationship with KnyghtMare.

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Service Submission

Service. It’s something that a lot of submissive say they are into giving. While it’s quite clear that the definition means that we are helping or doing work for someone, performing a kindness or favor, when we apply that term to D/s it tends to take on a more indepth role. Let’s explore some of the ways service submission exists in D/s relationships.

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Lessons in Submissive Speech

Not long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.

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BDSM vs Abuse

The core of BDSM is consent. No one will disagree with this. We are all aware, hopefully, that abuse is not consensual. If you feel that what is going on is ‘not right’ then you certainly should investigate if it is abuse or not. Some of what you may feel could not be abuse at all, but it’s good to know for sure. Learn how you can see the differences for yourself.

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The Real Meaning Behind Service and Serving as a Submissive

Service is any activity or function that you fill to make your dominant partner's life easier. This could be as simple as preparing their coffee, laying out their clothes for them or performing domestic chores. Yes, it does include the play and sex aspects of some relationships, but not all of them are wired this way.

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Living with Kids While in the D/s Lifestyle

Having kids can be a challenge in this lifestyle but I do recommend being honest with them at some point in their life. They deserve to come to this knowledge just as much as other things in this life. What they choose to do with said knowledge should be up to them.

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What Do Female Dominants Desire in a Male Submissive?

Do dominant women like this, that or the other thing? Unfortunately, there is no one set of ideal submissive traits that can be emulated. Indeed, if you ask these questions of twenty different Dominas, you’ll get at least twenty different answers. Each Dominant has her own idea of what makes a perfect submissive or slave. Some like youth and physical fitness, others like maturity and experience, tall or short, eloquent or not-so-much, pain slut or light-weight, sissy or not, emotive or the strong/silent type… well, as you can imagine, that list goes on and on. The problem, as I see it, is that too many (prospective) submissives get bogged down in trivial matters when they should be focusing on simple truth and sincerity.

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Service: There’s an App for that!

Well, there’s not really an App for service. Wouldn’t it be nice if there were? However, there are a lot of Apps out there that can make running your household (and your Master!) a lot easier!

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How To Overcome The Outside Forces That Stress Us

You will find these annoyances everywhere; anything outside of the relationship that causes undue tension within a pairing, they can be vanilla or lifestyle, major or minor issues, overt or subtle.

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Single In The Scene Part VI: Vulnerability

I’m of the opinion that there are many slaves who are unowned for one reason: fear of being vulnerable. I believe with all my being that if we don’t start reconciling ourselves with vulnerability, what we give in regards to service will come more from the surface than the core.

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