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What is Situational Service?

Situational service encompasses what I called conditional service. You serve only when presented with a specific set of circumstances, thus the situation is perfect for your service. This could be that you only submit on the weekends, or that you serve best when directed to do x, y and z.

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BDSM and Parenting

Here’s the bottom line. Yes, you can be kinky and be a parent. Yes, you can be a 24/7 submissive and still be a parent. It’s all about what you let your children see and how you explain the things they may hear or see that you were trying to hide.

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What Is Polyamory Anyway?

Polyamorous relationships take many forms and can include many different levels of intimacy. In many ways, polyamory is whatever you want it to be. But what it must be is honest, loving and accepting. The rest is up to you…

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When Is It Okay to Top From the Bottom?

Topping from the bottom has been given a bad wrap. It's considered by many to be a faux pax for any submissive. Online communities shun and shame many people who even ask about the subject and want to know if what they did was considered wrong. Too many people tell these people that yes it was wrong even if it really isn't. Today I'd like to tell you that there are a few perfectly valid situations where topping from the bottom is not only necessary but welcome. That's right, the fear of topping from the bottom doesn't have to bring fear to the heart of a submissive.

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The Question of Aftercare: What is It, Do You Need It and How to Ask For It (And Get It)

Aftercare is an elusive beast. Sometimes I need it and sometimes I'd rather be left alone. I'm never very sure which mood I'll be in when we begin playing but aftercare is always on standby because I take what happens in scene very hard. It goes with my very emotional self.

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Everything I Know About Submission I Learned from my Cat

The other day I was watching my cats and had a sudden realization that they way they live could have lessons for me and my submission if I wanted to see them. The truth is that you can pick up lessons everywhere you look if you want to.

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How to Safely Manage Sub Frenzy

How to manage sub frenzy so that it leaves you smarter, stronger and more prepared to handle the rush.

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In a New Relationship and Self Conscious About My Body

Here are a few tips for moving from sweating over this prospect to looking forward to sharing your body with a new partner.

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What Should I Try Next: Like Spanking? Try Flogging

Spanking is another starting point for many people entering the BDSM arena because it is so simple (seeming) and if using your hand pretty difficult to spank your way to injury. Flogging is one of the most standard of BDSM impact tools and a great next step for those looking to take things to the next level.

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New to D/s Relationships? Here's Your Foolproof Guide to Starting Out - Part 1

What makes a D/s relationship so different from mainstream relationships? Learn the key differences, how you can apply what you learn to your own relationships and watch it develop into your most fulfilling relationship possible.

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