Negotiating play is vital for new players or for those who have never played together. Once you get to know someone it is likely that unless you have something you'd really like to experience you can forego some negotiation for spontaneity.
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In this video series, I define terms that readers have asked me about! This one is all about safewords. Do you have a term you'd like defined? Let me know.
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The core of BDSM is consent. No one will disagree with this. We are all aware, hopefully, that abuse is not consensual. If you feel that what is going on is ‘not right’ then you certainly should investigate if it is abuse or not. Some of what you may feel could not be abuse at all, but it’s good to know for sure. Learn how you can see the differences for yourself.
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BDSM play can be risky, does bring about the potential for uncomfortable situations, raises physical limitations or triggers mental or emotional walls to come crashing down. In any of these instances, it would be very helpful to have a way to alert the dominant. Safewords are a verbal security blanket.
Read The Article | Find SimilarTopping from the bottom is a misunderstood term in BDSM, especially if you are a novice. Topping from the bottom is when you simultaneously adopt both roles. This could be in the form of giving commands, refusing requests or moving to control the location of impacts during play. Generally, it is frowned upon to try to force the Dominant’s hand to do something they do not wish to do.
Read The Series | Find SimilarBeing an emotionally healthy person is a goal that all of us have but a smaller margin actually accomplish. With the constant stress of commitments and modern day obligations, our emotions face the brunt of it. The goal of a submissive is to seek that balance in emotional states so that our service appears stress-free and sincere; even if we have a lot going on in the background. Living as an emotionally healthy submissive takes knowing what is considered healthy to begin with.
Read The Series | Find SimilarThe Advent is the time in anticipation for Christmas and is celebrated in some religious circles, but also carries a secular following. Advent translated means “the coming.” I’m sure everyone has seen the cardboard calendars with little doors and chocolate inside; to be opened one a day until Christmas Day.
Read The Series | Find SimilarMoney is power, and taking control of the finances is a way of exerting power over the relationship. Depending what your situation looks like, it may be more difficult than it sounds, especially if you are used to having full control over your money.
Read The Article | Find SimilarWe called the marriage counselor as a last-ditch effort to resuscitate “us” and it was the first move towards the life I had never imagined but somehow of which I had still always dreamt.
Read The Article | Find SimilarUnderstanding that you can be any labels you wish to, we’re going to try to understand why these labels are the ones we desire.
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