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Content related to "Why BDSM and Sex are Not Always Connected"

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Lessons in Submissive Speech

Not long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.

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Dressing for a Play Party; What to Wear

Even if you don't have any fetish wear in your wardrobe I'm sure you can find something that would be acceptable at the party.

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5 Types of Power Exchange Relationships

We can however, put every relationship into 5 different relationship types. I'm sure there are more, but for the purpose of this essay, I will be covering the 5 types that I can see in this life. This is not the only way to look at and describe relationships, but it is a good beginning. I am not a relationship expert and what I am writing about is my own observations. If you feel that another definition fits your idea of each relationship type, then by all means, please use your own.

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Getting to Know the Local and Not so Local BDSM Community: Attending Munch Groups

One of the most feared activities of a novice is getting up the nerve to meet other people face to face. Yet this is one of the first things that I and many others recommend for those wishing to get into BDSM. I encourage people to learn all they want behind the comfort of a computer screen but to really taste things as they are, they need to get out and experience it.

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Deceptive Submissive - The Flip Side of the Predator Dominant

Bogus submissives have only their own self-interest in mind; they manipulate others and take advantage of them for their own agenda. They cause just as much emotional damage as bogus Masters. They are a special breed of sexual predator.

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Male Submission - Fantasy vs Reality

Many submissive men have fantasies which have been developed over many years, sometimes leading to a focus on extreme and/or specific situations despite not having experienced anything. This may lead to misunderstandings with potential partners between fantasies and actual desires as the sub man may not even be able to recognize the difference at first.

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Tips for Taking Care of Your BDSM and Sex Toys

If you follow some simple guidelines you will be able to keep your BDSM and sex toys safe and extend their life expectancy.

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Entering the Community: Finding Other Local Kinksters Using Online Resources

The internet has opened you up to a world of possibility - including finding other kinky groups and people! Here's how you can collect a list of local meet-ups, groups, and interested persons.

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The Benefits of Orgasm Control and How to Get Started

Learn about orgasm control and how to get started adding it to your own sexual exchanges!

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What Should I Try Next: Like Service-based Play? Try Serving Others

If it pleases you like it pleases me to serve your Partner, consider adding service based play that involves other consenting parties. Adding things like hosting parties, formal tea parties or D/s dinners can make you feel good about offering your service.

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