For a novice submissive exploring SM, a checklist can open up a world of fantasies or scare you right back into your light kink and rough sex. Checklists are not meant to scare you or overwhelm you, but I've seen lists that are more like lists of all sorts of rare fetishes and extreme play that only a few ever explore. Why you would want or need that on a novice checklist is beyond me.
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Topping from the bottom is a misunderstood term in BDSM, especially if you are a novice. The idea behind the term is to actually help submissives understand their role, and isn't more than a faux paus. During interactions with your Dominant, it's a lesson to know that you can't control what is going on.
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Oftentimes, with novice submissives, it is assumed that showing any sort of desire for something that was not suggested by the Dominant would be topping from the bottom. Let me tell you now, having desires and asking for them to be fulfilled is not topping from the bottom.
Read The Article | Find SimilarEmbracing your single submissiveness is a strong and empowering trait. You can live a fulfilling singlehood if you remind yourself that there is much to do before you are ready to accept someone’s control of you.
Read The Series | Find SimilarWhilst it’s every submissive’s prerogative to make their own decisions for how they will take care of the home and manage a budget – I’d like to be a part of giving submissives a boost (or a kick in the butt) and hopefully in the process give them motivation and practical know how to get their home and life more in order and reaching their service potential.So we’ll be revisiting some old homecare tips, coming up with some new ones and hopefully will all improve in our domestic service as a result.
Read The Series | Find SimilarAll too often it becomes a necessity to take care of yourself after a play session because your top was just visiting or the play party is over. Even after a few days you may need to carry out some aftercare. Knowing what to do can prevent physical and emotional struggles.
Read The Article | Find SimilarSome say the difference between a submissive and a slave has nothing whatever to do with how much control one gives up or how submissive one is. That it's in one's actions. In the way the slave obeys without question or hesitation. In the respect in the slave's voice when he or she speaks with his or her owner. In the way the slave knows what the owner needs almost before the owner does. But I've known some submissives to show their dominants more respect than some slaves show their owners.
Read The Article | Find SimilarPredicament bondage can be simple or complex and playful or painful. It relies on the skill and evil imagination of the Dom/me to set up a position where your body is essentially going to punish itself. Picture your Dom/me pulling your hair to lower you to the ground. The hair pull is a simple illustration of a stressor. If you don’t lower yourself, you will be in pain.
Read The Article | Find SimilarEveryone has to start here. The very beginning, where all the jargon of BDSM starts to fill your mind and overwhelm your feelings. You think you are a pervert, or not normal. You could even be trying to suppress those kinky thoughts from your mind. But they keep creeping back in, don't they. For the brave souls that start searching for a common thread in their heads, a like-mindedness you can be sure that there is a sea of differences to swim through to get there.
Read The Article | Find SimilarI made the following printable chart which you can fill out and send to potential mentoring candidates to ensure clarity on both ends.
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