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Content related to "Learn to Speak Up and Speak Out: Empowering Yourself to Have a Voice"

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An Exercise to Help You Distinguish Between Wants and Needs

When we discuss basics, the needs are food, clothing and shelter, but what about relationships? When you enter into a relationship you have needs to be fulfilled also. These could be love, attention, and affection. In a D/s relationship these could also be rules, structure, discipline and many others.

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After "Red" : How to Manage the Aftermath When You've Used Your Safeword

You should never fear using your safeword. There are ways to deal with the guilt, disappointment, fear, sense of failure for using your safeword and the failing to use your safeword at all that many of us feel at one time or another.

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Introducing BDSM to Your Partner

It is a scary proposition to approach your partner who may be oblivious to your new desires about wanting to add a bit or a lot of kink to your relationship. Whatever they decide it’s up to you on how you proceed. If they want to give it a try – go ahead! If they are far from interested you still have avenues available to you. It doesn’t automatically mean the end of the relationship.

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Simply Service e-Zine

One of the hidden jewels on this site is an e-Zine that ran on Yahoo Groups back when I first started exploring submission. It has since stopped production but the articles it contained are still valuable and worth a read so I thought I ‘d bring them back to the forefront. They’ve been archived here with the editor’s permission since the site was first created but I don’t think many of you know just how wonderful they are. I encourage you to check them out!

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The Control Book

What a submissive can learn from this book is how a Dominant uses power and control to give them what they need. After all, many of us are control-sensitive submissives and derives pleasure and satisfaction from this type of relationship.

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How To Talk About Your Wants and Needs With Your Dominant

Once you have your list worked out and are satisfied with how important it is for you to have these needs met, it's time to express them. Not only will it keep your submissive transparent, but it will provide you with information on your partner's wants and needs. Needs lists are not negotiable. You shouldn't settle and you should never have someone convince you that your needs aren't important.

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How to Serve a Self-Sufficient Dominant

It's far harder to serve a self-sufficient Dominant because they want to do everything themselves. It is not impossible though.

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Why You Should Know the Truth About Topping from the Bottom

Ask one hundred submissives why they consider topping from the bottom as bad and they will likely come up with something relating to "forcing the Dominant's hand." They'd be right. The real, honest to goodness, truth is that forcing the Dominant's hand is the only way you can bottom-top. How you do that is situational, different for different people or different reasons and you really can't list the exact ways that it comes about.

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How to Be Responsive During Play Without Being Demanding

You walk a tightrope of topping from the bottom and being a good receptive bottom when you learn how to be responsive during play.

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Must I Always Wait for My Dominant to Tell me What to Do?

You aren't a doormat. As a submissive, you can have autonomy and an active submission you can be proud of. So, must you always wait for orders? You tell me.

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