The core of BDSM is consent. No one will disagree with this. We are all aware, hopefully, that abuse is not consensual. If you feel that what is going on is ‘not right’ then you certainly should investigate if it is abuse or not. Some of what you may feel could not be abuse at all, but it’s good to know for sure. Learn how you can see the differences for yourself.
Read The Series | Find SimilarWants and needs are very important to any relationship. When you start to understand who you are as a submissive, it’s time to figure out what you are looking for in a relationship. The difference between wants and needs can be answered in one basic question. Is this something you can live without?
Read The Series | Find SimilarDuring submissive frenzy, you may feel a desperate need to have your desires fulfilled. Many of the activities in BDSM can be considered addictive and frenzy is much like a withdrawal stage. This series will help you understand your urgent feelings and how to listen to your gut when you need it most.
Read The Series | Find SimilarNot long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.
Read The Series | Find SimilarSo, you’ve discovered this great big world of BDSM and you just don’t know what to do now. Welcome! I suggest you start here in learning some of the vocabulary you’ll find around the internet and I want to help you get your head around all the things you’ll encounter, just a bit at a time.
Read The Series | Find SimilarThis book reads like fiction and a one true way sort of manual. If that's your thing, then pick it up.
Read The Review | Find Similar"To please him." Sure it's a selfless response, but is it always the best answer and perhaps not the most honest? I'm going to talk about why I think we need to reflect on the question more before we consider the auto-response to be the true and valid one for our personal submission.
Read The Article | Find SimilarSubmission does not have to be full-time. It doesn't even have to be in the same room. But it does have to fill a need inside of you and when done right should fill you up and reaffirm your choices.
Read The Article | Find SimilarRituals and protocols can add richness, structure and even a little fun to a D/s relationship. Knowing the difference between the two can help the submissive better understand the desires and intentions of the dominant, and to be more pleasing when performing them.
Read The Article | Find SimilarWhether dominant or submissive, we have been shaped by our pasts. Many of us take the messages we heard in our childhood, into our adult lives and still believe these terrible things about ourselves.
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