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Content related to "8 Ways You Might Be a "Doormat" Submissive and How to Stop"

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5 Tips for Coping with Your Jealousy in a D/s Dynamic

Whether you’re in a D/s dynamic that’s open to new play partners, or you’re in a polyamorous relationship, jealousy can be a challenge. If it’s causing snags in your relationships (and even before it does), coping with jealousy can be a useful skill to learn. These five tips will have you well on your way.

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Introducing BDSM to Your Partner

It is a scary proposition to approach your partner who may be oblivious to your new desires about wanting to add a bit or a lot of kink to your relationship. Whatever they decide it’s up to you on how you proceed. If they want to give it a try – go ahead! If they are far from interested you still have avenues available to you. It doesn’t automatically mean the end of the relationship.

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Collars and Collaring

A collar symbolizes your commitment and quite often your love and devotion to the Dominant. A collar for submissives is one of the most fundamental symbols of their relationship and one that is usually guarded and protected with their heart.There are no right or wrong ways to be collared. They can be formal or informal. They can be private or in front of a group of your friends and “family”. For those of you who wish to plan a more formal celebration, there are many things to consider.

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Limits

Limits are personal boundaries that everyone places for how far they are willing to take things. These limits can be sexual, personal, emotional or otherwise. You may even have some for your every day that you don’t realize are limits. If you don’t have any BDSM experience, the idea of setting up limits can be challenging. Let’s dive into what they are, how to figure them out and why you make sure they are respected.

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Discipline and Punishment

Discipline comes in all shapes and sizes.It is a part of molding a submissive’s behavior and making corrections when they step out of line. Punishment though is a different beast. Punishment is for very severe infractions. I consider this to be things that could be deal breakers or relationship-enders. Punishment of this caliber should be rare or not at all. These differences are discussed and explored in the following series.

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Submissive Positions

Submissive Positions are talked about all over like everyone is supposed to be doing them or something. Not every relationship is set up to provide that level of protocol and you should never expect a relationship to automatically have that. If you are interested in positions, ask your partner or prospective partner if they’d be interested before you go learning any. They may have preferences to how you should look and act. Following them is by far more important than learning about positions online (unless that is their direction).

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Domestic Service

Whilst it’s every submissive’s prerogative to make their own decisions for how they will take care of the home and manage a budget – I’d like to be a part of giving submissives a boost (or a kick in the butt) and hopefully in the process give them motivation and practical know how to get their home and life more in order and reaching their service potential.So we’ll be revisiting some old homecare tips, coming up with some new ones and hopefully will all improve in our domestic service as a result.

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Lessons in Submissive Speech

Not long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.

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What Is A Doormat Submissive?

A common derogatory word used in submissive circles is “doormat” as in, you don’t want to be a doormat submissive. Rarely is it talked about beyond saying that you should not let your Dominant walk all over you. I agree of course, but for the inexperienced, understanding what that really means can come after being trampled into the mat.

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Sample Consensual "Slavery" Contract

A simple sample contract you can use to create your own.

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