Okay, so our worlds didn’t really collide, they just tapped each other a little bit. This is what happened: Mr. K, my Master, and I went out to lunch a few weeks ago. One of our protocols is that I prepare his beverages. For iced tea, for instance, he likes one “blue” and one “pink.” We were seated at the restaurant and I was busily doing my thing--fixing his tea to his liking. My tea is off to the side and his glass is in the middle of the table in front of me, so that I can lean over and stir in the sweeteners. The waitress comes up while I’m in the middle of my ministrations looks at both of us strangely and says to me, “Oh, so do you have some kind of special powers?” I looked up at her and smiled and said, “Why, yes I do.”

This was the first time our vanilla life and our kinky life had come into any sort of conflict, albeit mild. It seems as if the deeper into the lifestyle we get, the edges between the two worlds begin to blur. This got me to thinking. See, I’d really like for both of our lifestyles to be fully integrated. For example, the amount of subterfuge Master and I had to go through when having my brother look after the kids while we were away for the weekend attending SWLC was ridiculous. (“Here’s all our contact information. We’re going to a, uh spiritual conference, yeah, that’s it.”) Or even more trivial matters, such as despite my ultra conservative profession, it would be nice if I could wear a tasteful collar to work or refer to my husband “Master” if the mood strikes me. It’s not that I plan on regaling my relatives or clients with the particulars of our intimate life--far from it. It’s simply that BDSM in general (and M/s in particular) have become such an integral part of us that the duality sometimes feels less than forthright.

Mr. K, on the other hand, prefers our lives separate and likens himself to Batman or some other superhero with a secret identity. He sees no need to reveal his private life to the world. Because he is my Master, obviously his approach is the one we take. Moreover, I realize his path is the more sensible one, given that WIITWD is not fully accepted or understood by the larger society. Most of us have heard of at least one person who has lost a job or has suffered strained familial relationships because the “wrong people” found out about their involvement in BDSM. So even if the choice were left to me, although there’s still a small part of me that yearns to shout from the roof tops “I’m kinky and happy about it!” (LOL) for now, discretion wins the day.

So, what say you? Have your worlds collided lately?


mrs. K