Mentoring, self-help and submissive exploration

Ted_subby is a 49 year old submissive to his monogamous dominant wife of over a dozen years. On his male submission web page at he posts fictional stories as well as a blog of his experiences with his dominant wife. Feel free to message him on FetLife or e-mail.

25 responses to “Male Submission – Fantasy vs Reality”

  1. Craig

    I believe most male submissives are not having a fantansy,but are truly longing to be a total slave to a very Dominant Woman.The problem in the USA is finding a Dominant Woman to serve 24/7,most Women in the USA have very low self esteem,so they are on there knees with a low life pig males cock in Her mouth.So the submissive male just keeps longing like me,that one day I will get lucky and find that Dominant Woman I longed for all of my life,and be Her slave.If you look at the Japanese Female Dominants,they donot play at all,they believe all male slaves should serve as toilets,they beat and whip there slaves all over the body,and thats the way it should be,no safe words.Most submissive males want a Dominant Woman to take total control of him,like property.If She tells Her slave to get on his knees and lick Her shitty ass clean,the slave should do it with out question the first time.So it is not fantansy,it is more like dreaming of finding a Dominant Woman to be Her total slave,real slave 24/7.

  2. Craig

    Just to ad to the above,many Women and girls are not taught how great they truly are.
    If you look at the Goddess who started Yapoo Market Dominant Female videos in Japan,She instructs other Women how Great they truly are and raise there self esteem and teach them who males really are,filthy pigs whos only worth is a toilet for Women.
    That is not only true in Japan,but all over the planet,especially in the USA.Males in the USA call themselves dogs and pigs,just look at there actions.
    So more Dominant Women in the USA need to open up schools for Women only and teach them how Superior they truly are to all males.Males are really maggots under a Womans boots and in Her Shit.Women in the USA need to take a page from the Japanese Dominant Females,then we may in another 20 years have a better country once Dominant Women take full control of the pig males in it.Then it will be no problem for male slaves to find a Female Master.

  3. tiffany

    I am a dominant female and have finally found my slave, it is so much better when their is love and the submissive trusts her.. I think it is very important to find that perfect match for each individual.. It is truly a lifestyle to enjoy.

  4. Ted

    @tiffany: Thank you for the comment, I am glad that although it has taken time you have finally found someone who is right for you.

  5. Keith Smith

    I love this article about fantasy vs reality. For me the reality matches very well with the fantasy. Yes the reality is even better than the fantasy. Some of my fantasies have not become reality and may never. I imagine being a schoolboy and being bent over the Headmasters or Headmistresses desk for a caning. Now this has not happened. But I have been strapped, caned, flogged, sjamboked, whipped, paddled etc. I really love it.

    One of the subjects raised in the article was fear. Every time before a session I am scared, I know that it will hurt. Yet this is the very thing that I desire to experience and in actuality would be very disappointed if it did not occur. Once the session starts it is far to late to be fearful. I do spend quite a bit of time trying to evade the strokes without any success might I add.

    I will share a bit about the main person who plays with me by far the most of the time. She approached me the next time I saw her and asked me if I would like her to play with me. Now having said the next time obviously means that there had been a previous occasion. Yes there had been. Previously she had demoed as Top at ‘Fetish Night’. I bottomed at the next Demo. She noticed that I like receiving hard Impact Play which she also likes giving.

    Another section of this article dealt with the matter of one partner keeping their BDSM interests secret from their partner for quite some time. I can identify with this as this was my situation. When I was going out with my now wife prior to our marriage she asked me if I was into anything. Not wanting to lose her I said that I was not. At different times I tried introducing a belt into our bed at night. This freaked her out altogether as she thought that I wanted to use it on her when in fact I wanted her to use it on me. After 10 years of vanilla marriage I showed my wife an item that I purchased from an Adult Shop. It was a riding crop or something similar as I recall. I gave myself a bare bottomed thrashing with it – some 500 strokes and told her “See it has not hurt me and as you can see it has turned me on” (as evidenced by my massive erection). “Next time I would like you to use it on me. She did and used it very hard which I throughly enjoyed. My wife took to this activity with particular enthusiasm.

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