Mentoring, self-help and submissive exploration

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Self-Esteem/Grooming Series Concludes: Accepting Comments and Compliments

Self-Esteem/Grooming Series Concludes: Accepting Comments and Compliments

At the beginning of the series, I addressed the idea that the final layer of the way we perceive ourselves is a product of how others perceive us. Although the focus of the series technically is building routines around grooming and health to maintain your own self-image, it would be unfair to ignore what I [...]

Leave a comment Posted by kallista | Posted in: Beginner Basics

Self-Esteem Through Grooming Part 4: Diet & Exercise

This was probably the trickiest piece to add to the series. None of this is actually meant to be soapboxing, but because body image is such a hot-button topic, it was difficult to keep this short, effective, and yet general enough that I’m not trying to dictate the way that people should eat and exercise [...]

Leave a comment Posted by kallista | Posted in: Personal Growth

Self-Esteem Through Grooming Part 3: Nail Care

As I stated in the introduction to my article about the upkeep of hair, the care that you give you nails, feet and hands plays an important role in how you present yourself to other people, and as such, their upkeep can greatly boost your sense of self-worth. Again, this is partially achieved by giving [...]

Leave a comment Posted by kallista | Posted in: Personal Growth

Self-Esteem Through Grooming Part 2: Hair

Whether you’re a little, a slave, or a sub, the condition of your hands and hair can make or break your appearance. Just like wearing a costume, you’d never put on an outfit and then leave your hair to do its natural thing, and the remnants of your three week old nail polish on your [...]

1 comment Posted by kallista | Posted in: Personal Growth

Self-Esteem Through Grooming Part 1: Skin Care

It’s probably a cliché to start this article with a play on the adage, “beauty is only skin deep,” but let’s face it, when you’re embarking on a conversation about your complexion, there really is no better way to start. Taking care of your skin is incredibly important, not just on your face, but on [...]

1 comment Posted by kallista | Posted in: Personal Growth


[Video Post] Ask lunaKM – A Non-Romantic BDSM Relationship, Is It Wise?

Judi is a Patron Member and as a perk of her support, she was able to ask me a question to be answered in a video post. You can get your question answered too! Join Patreon and support Submissive Guide. As a new sub, I have a lot to learn, and I am just starting [...]

30, September | 4 comments

[Video Post] Improving Your Submission – Setting Goals and Making a Plan

Welcome back to another video post! In the last episode we talked about how to identify what improving your submission needs – a focus. In that video I asked you to make a list of things you feel (or your Dom feels) that need improvement to make your submission better and more fulfilling. If you [...]

31, August | Leave a comment

[Video Post] Improving Your Submission: Identify Your Focus

Every submissive everywhere has asked this question at one time or another, whether that be to themselves, to their partner or to a mentor like myself. How do I improve my submission? The challenge with answering this question is that it’s such a broad, generic question. It’s almost impossible for any non-invested person to answer. [...]

22, June | 2 comments

BDSM Basics – What Your First Date Might Look Like

Welcome back to the next part in the BDSM Basics series. In earlier episodes we figured out if we were kinky, what role we are, how to stay safe and how to find a partner. In this article we’ll talk about what your first date might look like. I’ll cover two different situations for a [...]

27, April | 1 comment

BDSM Basics – How Do I Find Someone to Play With?

It’s the burning question on our lips now isn’t it? Through the earlier posts we’ve learned whether you are kinky, what role or roles we might enjoy and how to stay safe when exploring kink. So it makes sense that you now want to know how to find someone to experiment with and maybe have [...]

19, January | 7 comments


Book Review: Transforming Your Relationship: A Comprehensive Look into the Domestic Discipline Lifestyle by Clint and Chelsea

Transforming Your Relationship is by Clint and Chelsea, the couple who runs the blog Learning Domestic Discipline. They introduced the domestic discipline(DD) dynamic into their relationship back in 2008 and because there are so few resources out there for the dynamic, they began their blog in 2011 to help others who are interested in the DD dynamic. [...]

12, November | Leave a comment

Book Review-Opening Up: A Guide To Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships by Tristan Taormino

I’m currently in a poly relationship and have been in several poly relationships in the past. Despite the numerous poly relationships I have been in, Tristan Taormino’s Opening Up is the first non fiction book that I have read about polyamorous relationships. This book has been on my reading list for quite some time and [...]

26, August | Leave a comment

Book Review: The Ritual of Dominance & Submission: A Guide to High Protocol Dominance & Submission

One of the more selective skills of a D/s relationship is protocol. Many of the misconceptions is that it’s hard to do and that only the more serious power exchange relationships participate. KnyghtMare and I have some moderate protocol all the time since I love it and he likes control so anytime he gets opportunity [...]

26, June | Leave a comment

Book Review: Bondage Snippets by Verianna LaCroix

Bondage Snippets by Verianna LaCroix isn’t like any other non-fiction BDSM book that I have read. Instead of being a book that explains the in and outs of the dynamic or a how to type of book. Bondage Snippets is a book that gives you a sneak peek into the lives of male and female [...]

19, May | Leave a comment

Book Review: The Warrior Princess Submissive by Michael Makai

I have been wanting to read Michael Makai’s The Warrior Princess Submissive for a while. This is one of those books where the title totally caught my interest. I found myself thinking “Well, I’m submissive, I am definitely a princess, and who doesn’t want to be a warrior?” Not only did the title catch my [...]

12, May | 8 comments

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