Dear lunaKM,

My question involves role play, I was wondering if there are some scenarios that are available to give an individual some idea of how to start a scene. And or what kind of scene would be the easiest to get started with because I am a beginner and I usually go my instinct when I'm involved with a woman and as I explore this venue of bondage ( I especially like rope bondage) I was hoping there would be a story line or something to give me some Ideas of how to proceed into an exhilarating climax for my partner and myself, frankly, I'm intrigued by this lifestyle because the people involved seem highly artistic in nature and sincere with integrity. Respectfully Czarofguitar.

Dear Czarofguitar,

Most scenes that I'm familiar with do not have a script or require roles to put on.  Oftentimes you just do whatever you want to do with the tools you have. A scene can be anything you want it to be. Of course if you are looking for storylines or something similiar the Xeromag site has a great list of BDSM Scenarios and Kinky Sex Ideas that could help you out.

Dear lunaKM,

I am having an issue. Mainly right now I am going through the whole interview process with Doms to find one that will fit the right way with me. Of course I know it wont be 100%, but at least we can communicate any differences. I have played with a few. None of this seem to be a problem. The problem I am having is that I have degenerative bone disease. Recently it is affecting my knees. This is making it very difficult for me to kneel. Not just no kneeling at somebody's feet. But no kneeling in bed either. Along with this I have had to give up a fetish of my own (wearing heels). I'm actually pretty down and out about the whole thing. I almost feel defeated. Any idea on how I can over come these obstacles? I feel that if I am not able to be on my knees in some way then I am not giving enough of my submission. I know this is a selfish concern because most if not all of the Doms I've talked to understand. Advise would be appreciated.

Dear difficult to kneel,

While I don't have a bone disease I do have Carpal Tunnel in both wrists which impacts how and when I server KnyghtMare. We have had to work around my abilities and in some cases stop doing a few of my favorite thing in order to protect my health and not to inflict unnecessary pain. I understand how kneeling can make you feel submissive but it's not the act of actually kneeling that does that for you - it's in your head. You have placed a trigger there that says when you kneel for someone you are giving all of your submission to them. I think it's time you try to reprogram that need. I've written about how the simple act of placing yourself below waist height of your partner is all that is needed to get the same feeling.

If you really do feel depressed about the way your body is changing and limiting your movement and desires for things I suggest you talk with a therapist to help boost your moods and give you some coping mechanisms. Some therapists are also kink friendly and you can talk about your missing fetish also.

Oh, you know you could wear heels to bed and for play - would that give you a similar feeling and take care of your fetish a bit? No standing required!

Dear Luna,

ive never been confident enough to outwardly express my desires to any partner i have had. So now im in a very good year a half relationship and i can't figure out how to break the ice with my boyfriend on what id really like him to do. How do i ask?

Dear needing confidence,

I have 2 concerns. First, that you've been with this person for a year and a half and don't feel comfortable talking to them about your personal wants and needs. While I realize that it takes guts, you should feel comfortable talking about anything with them by this time. Are you keeping other secrets too? My second concern is that when you reveal these things you will find they are taken aback or surprised that you have kept these desires from them for so long. It won't matter if they are interested in being kinky with you or not, they could see it as deception.

In either case, try writing it out if you can talk to them face to face. Leave erotica out for them to find with things in it that you want to try. Hint to them that you have a sexy desire you'd like to play out. And then talk to them, take your time and make notecards if you need help saying what you have to say, but say it. Be prepared for any responses. Good luck.