I have been in my first D/s relationship for the past 6 months. My Sir and I don't live together yet but that is the plan for the future, although I am with him whenever I am not working.  There are a few things that are bothering me and I would like to know if these things are normal in other D/s relationships. They are:

• When I am with my Sir I pay for everything he doesn't pay for anything although he works full time.
• He likes to drink quite heavily every chance he gets and when he does he gets quite mean and nasty and here have been several times he has old me to pack up and leave that we are done, even though I have not done anything wrong. 
• There have been times when I have been physically sick and asleep and he wakes me up demanding to be fed and or for sex. 
• I know that in the beginning he had another sub but he has now told me that he wants two more subs as well as me.  I will be his primary. There is never any discussions , it is his way or the highway so to speak.  
• One of my hard limits has been fisting, it scares me and I don't think I am physically able to handle it, but of late he says he is training me to be fisted and that he will fist me eventually despite my objections.

I suppose one could say and another sub he has know for several years has called him a bully. At times our relationship borders on domestic violence. Especially when he drinks. My problem is is it me is this normal behavior for a Dom? When he doesn't drink he is wonderful and I do love and adore him but at my age in life (55) I don't need this kind of turmoil. What should Ido?

Is this normal D/s? No, gosh no. It sounds like you are being used, abused and tossed aside.

You ask me what you should do but I think you've answered that yourself in your message, "I don't need this kind of turmoil". You are right. He's not treating you right and in much of your message screams abuse and disregard for your safety.

A Dominant should care for their partner. They should not cross their limits without a consensual agreement to it. And that fact that he says he's very different, almost bordering on domestic violence when he drinks is scary.

You need to ask yourself if you want to live in a home where abuse is possible, you are forced to do activities you do not want to do and that your safety is not protected.  I'm sure you've already made up your mind but trust me, you deserve to be treated better.

Move on. Don't look back.