Mentoring, self-help and submissive exploration

lunaKM has been a full-time slave in an M/s relationship for over 10 years. She is the founder and editor of Submissive Guide. Learn more about her here and connect with her on, Twitter, Google+, FetLife.

51 responses to “The Differences Between Bottom, Masochist, Submissive and Slave”

  1. Wiked

    Gor is a figment of somebody’s imagination.The “feeling” in the belly you speak of and all else you describe is the same a slave feels in the REAL world.Everything in “Gor” slave training has been taken and given a new name.

  2. Wiked

    a bottom will give directions and make suggestions as to what and when to do to her/him, and this is only in the bedroom. a submissive submits outside the bedroom, but can tend to say no, and have limits that they wish to either not be crossed or be pushed by the right Dom, and slave gives up everything, material possessions, job, and her/his Master/Mistress is their “world”

  3. WindDancer

    Greetings, My name in the Gorean universe is the same as yours. I have been learning the lifestyle since 1998. I must say that I agree totaly with everything that you have stated . I have owned a few slaves myself and it is hard to find one that truly knows or understands what being a slave truly means or is. I am impressed that a slave cobalt has the integrity to finaly tell it as it is. Most want to test their boundaries to see how far they can push it before getting in trouble. I say that is a waist of effort. Why purposly cause disfunction in your relationship. Spend that time being what you claim to be…a slave whos only purpose is to please , not cause disruption.anyway I just wanted to say its good to see there are still some left worth having. You bring honor to your owner. Be most well

  4. pencildick

    i consider myself submissive and masochistic. i enjoy being told what to do and being obediant. Butt what i really enjoy is being verbally insulted and abused and treated like shit thru e-mail or texting or just seeing it in print. i have neveer heard of anyone else loveing this and been shown less that zero respect.
    if anyone knows of places or people that are into this kinda thing please send them my way.

  5. Yessir

    Try It is exactly what you are looking for.

  6. Stella Omega

    Let me suggest a clarification regarding bottoming and topping; the bottom is not necessarily the “lower” role.

    Rather, the bottom is the person being done unto, receiving sensation, or being restrained. The top is the person giving sensation, doing unto, tying the rope.

    It’s perfectly possible for a dominant to enjoy sensation and for a submissive to give the sensation that the dominant requires.

    This confusion is a problem, especially for women– so many of us have never separated our inward-pointing sexuality from the societal roles. We think that to receive a penis means we’ve submitted. It isn’t always true. Women, especially, may be masochists, or bottoms in other ways, on their own terms. I ask any woman looking at submission to think about what that means to her, and to re-examine her needs in another direction. This can save a lot of grief later on as a woman begins to come into her own and her erstwhile Dom fights against the changes– and those women who are submissive will know for sure that’s what we are.

  7. Isabella

    My online or rp Dom calls me by my sub name after playing and during a regular conversation. Is that the norm? I find it strange but not offensive.

  8. rane

    I’m married to my Top and I’m his sub. I vassilate between sub and bottom but was started as a slave. We are equals outside the bedroom. Close the doors and the power and control shifts mostly to him but I have my safewords to let him know where I am in the scene.

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