For a novice submissive exploring SM, a checklist can open up a world of fantasies or scare you right back into your light kink and rough sex. Checklists are not meant to scare you or overwhelm you, but I've seen lists that are more like lists of all sorts of rare fetishes and extreme play that only a few ever explore. Why you would want or need that on a novice checklist is beyond me.
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When I first think of transactional service I think of a business transaction. Someone pays you for a service and you provide that service. Transactional service for the submissive is very much the same. You do something for your Dominant and in return you get something.
Read The Article | Find SimilarThere are many different aspects to financial domination, maybe as many as there are D/s relationships. There is a chance that at some point the issue of financial domination will come up between you and your Dominant. If and when this happens, here is some practical advice.
Read The Series | Find SimilarNot long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.
Read The Series | Find SimilarOne of the hidden jewels on this site is an e-Zine that ran on Yahoo Groups back when I first started exploring submission. It has since stopped production but the articles it contained are still valuable and worth a read so I thought I ‘d bring them back to the forefront. They’ve been archived here with the editor’s permission since the site was first created but I don’t think many of you know just how wonderful they are. I encourage you to check them out!
Read The Series | Find SimilarService. It's something that a lot of submissive say they are into giving. But what does that mean?
Watch The Video | Find SimilarI know that communication in the lifestyle is one of those topics that are constantly talked about, but I believe that’s because a lot of people don’t truly understand the importance of communication and how easily a relationship can turn sour if there is a breakdown in communication.
Read The Article | Find SimilarThere are several different types of Financial Domination, including dynamics which do not involve the dominant receiving any money whatsoever. This is often not understood when some people rail against Financial Domination as a legitimate kink.
Read The Article | Find SimilarI've taken some of the guesswork out of it for you by providing you the top 3 books I recommend to everyone new to BDSM. The only thing you have to do is figure out which one you want to buy first!
Read The Article | Find SimilarYou have to admit that the books that resonate with you the most, are ones you've read more than once. Here's my list of 9 of the best BDSM and D/s related books that I've pulled off the shelf time and time again.
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