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Content related to "Play Nice: Some Notes on Scene Etiquette and Leather Protocol (Part 5 of 7) - Flagging, Symbols, and Rituals"

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Submissive Frenzy

During submissive frenzy, you may feel a desperate need to have your desires fulfilled. Many of the activities in BDSM can be considered addictive and frenzy is much like a withdrawal stage. This series will help you understand your urgent feelings and how to listen to your gut when you need it most.

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Lessons in Submissive Speech

Not long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.

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3 Challenges of Having Rules in a D/s Relationship

Three challenges that come about after rules are selected and you are practicing them or have had them for a long time.

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First Playtime Jitters and How to Arrive Prepared

Every submissive goes though it. You may be going through it now. Those butterflies in your stomach because you've just set a date for your first play session. Things are still so new and exciting. You don't know what to expect or how you will react to things. It's all so strange and foreign feeling. You aren't alone. Even the most experienced submissive can go through the butterflies before play, but there are ways to learn to relax and be a bit more prepared for what might happen at your first play session.

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The Female of the Species: Bisexuality and Identifying as Submissive

Playing with other girls can be great, but it works the best when everyone wants it to happen. Not just 2 out of the 3. I think there needs to be an attraction too, in whatever form it takes whether it's physical or something else or that added x factor. For me I enjoy it the most when I play with someone who I consider a friend and who I am comfortable with, so I think my advice for anyone wanting to explore this is that it's best to find a good friend first and see where it goes if an attraction develops just like any other relationship.

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The Question of Aftercare: What is It, Do You Need It and How to Ask For It (And Get It)

Aftercare is an elusive beast. Sometimes I need it and sometimes I'd rather be left alone. I'm never very sure which mood I'll be in when we begin playing but aftercare is always on standby because I take what happens in scene very hard. It goes with my very emotional self.

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Your Right to Choose-Feminism and the Lifestyle

I know that being a feminist means different things to different people. To me, feminism has always been about having the right to choose to lead the kind of life that I want to.

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The Year's Best-Selling BDSM Books and eBooks from Amazon Voted by YOU

Here are the books you are reading based on my Amazon statistics!

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BDSM and Kids: When Kids Ask Awkward Questions

As a kinkster, there’s a chance that, eventually, they’ll see or hear something and ask you about it. You’ve answered questions about poop, penises, and what those ducks were doing to one another in the park (or was that just me?). You’ve got this.

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A Personal First: Bootblacki​ng and Boot Worship

I won't bore you with the step by step details of what I did. However, what is of key importance for this writing is what I felt. I was extremely focused, calm even. There was an intense feeling of determination. My understanding being that I was contributing to Sir's uniform; his appearance; and I wanted him to look sharp!

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