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Content related to "Safewords Are Not "Safe Words""

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How To Find Someone to Play With at a Party and Other Negotiation Basics

One of the more daunting prospects as a single kinky person or someone who is open to casual play is approaching others at a play party with whom you might be interested playing. It’s often called pick up play because you are simply trying to pick someone up for the purpose of play. Whether you are a top or a bottom, the cold approach is scary. But there is help!

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For Consent to Count…ASSENT Has to Matter

I've been following an epic thread on consent for months now, watching sadly as many of the comments devolve into dangerously magical thinking and wishing somebody would speak up, and say "Whoa. There's a point at which personal responsibility comes into play here."

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Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of a Predator Dom/me Part 2

Once you start in training you have a better chance to evaluate your new Dom/me. Is the Dom creating a positive learning environment, or does s/he make you feel that you are constantly failing his/her orders? Was it really a newbie mistake, or is there a lack of training that is causing the failure? Submission can easily set up a feeling of need and dependency on the Dom/me.

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Every Submissive's Worst Fear: When Your Dominant Wants to Play with Others

It's never easy to set aside insecurities. No one is asking you to go at this alone. Your partner is there and wants you to come with him as he fulfills his needs.

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Do You Make These Mistakes? Avoid Outing a Fellow BDSM Lifestyler

There is one rule that breaking it is considered a cardinal sin in the world of BDSM-outing a fellow lifestyler. Doing such can have life changing effects on their vanilla life and the kinky life of the person who does the outing.

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The Anatomy of A BDSM Scene: What Happens?

Let me describe to you what a first scene might be like.

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Everything That's Wrong with Your BDSM Limits List - And How To Fix It

Most of us have problems with really making the limit list a full picture of what your boundaries are and tend to stick with play activities.

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How Far Should You Go On a First Date?

My first dates ran the gamut of things you can do and should do and definitely should not do. I do hope that my suggestions and advice will give you some ideas and a solid foundation to start from.

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We Do Not Out Each Other: Protecting People's Privacy

Protecting each other's privacy is so important. We don't out each other. We just don't.

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What Should I Try Next: Like Role Play? Try Medical Play!

A great way to push the envelope in role play is by trying out medical play. Medical play lends itself so easily to BDSM. You can include bondage (stirrups, anybody?), massively amplify power roles (doctor taking advantage of patient is so taboo), and include new elements of sado-masochistic play.

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