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What is (Emotional) Abuse in a BDSM Relationship?

Mistress Steel takes aim at emotional abuse in BDSM relationships with a thorough definition and discussion about what it looks like and the impact it can have in a power exchange relationship. This article is a jumping off point and is meant to help you learn what is and isn’t abuse. If you feel you are being abused and need help, please contact your local partner abuse hotline. http://www.pleaselive.org/hotlines/

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Showing 61 to 70 of 85.

Subspace

Exploring submission play can involve intense sensation. Subspace is a mental and physical response to the high levels of endorphins produced during play. Described as similar to a runner’s high this is a good feeling and one to be enjoyed if you ever get there.

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That Don't Impress Me Much: Why You Should Not Withhold Your Safeword

If you don't use your safeword, you could be in for more than just an overly sore backside. A safeword is your lifeline and your partner trusts you to use it if you need to. TR shares a personal story where playing with no safewords went wrong.

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The 6 Most Common STDs

Everytime we talk about sex and sexually related activities such as many of the BDSM and kinky play we do it's important, if not imperative, that we are safe and aware of the most common sexually transmitted diseases and infections you can get. You should have tests for STDs regularly if you choose to have multiple partners, or if you are changing partners. Maintaining a clean bill of sexual health will provide yourself and your partner(s) with reassurance and safety. Even though you may be disease free does not mean you shouldn't practice safe sex. If you need a refresher, check the previous post on safer kinky sex practices.

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The Abuse Debate: A Matter of Acceptance Not Consent

BDSM relationships make the argument on abuse much more complicated than it already is, and those in TPE relationship have an even harder time than that. For non-kinky people, it's pretty easy to define abuse. How do you define abuse if the way the dictionary defines it just does not apply to you?

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The BDSM Safety Mantras

The mantra “Safe, Sane, Consensual” (SSC) is probably one of the first things that someone new to the scene learns. But did you know there is more than one mantra you can choose to apply to your style of play? “Risk Aware Consensual Kink” (RACK) is an alternative and more common preference for the experienced player. The key to them both is Consent.

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The Checks and Balances in Power Exchange

Being a smart, capable woman whose self-awareness has led her to identify wholly as a slave, I have set up some checks and balances in my life that help me feel comfortable pushing myself further in my Power Exchange dynamic.

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The Controversy of Safe Words during Punishment

Receiving punishment without having a safe word in place isn’t for everyone.

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Article

The Emotional Side of Sub Drop and Why It Happens More In Committed Relationships

There is a more intense side of Sub Drop that gets very little attention because for each person it is different and describing how to recover can take many forms. If not cared for, you could go into depression just from one play session. The endorphins and other hormones released during play leave your body in such a way that it takes the time to rebuild the balance of hormones in your system. You could feel like you have a hang over or partied too hard the night before, you could feel lost and depressed for hours or days.

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Article

The Importance of Consent in D/s Negotiation

Consent and Negotiation are probably something that we think about but don’t really acknowledge daily. It is important none the less to think about and address in a Dominant/submissive relationship.

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The Safety Disguise of Safewords: Safewords Are Not Always Safe

It's not my intention to scare you or convince you that you shouldn't have a safeword. but don't ever expect your safeword to protect you. You can not have safewords without trust.

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