Negotiating play is vital for new players or for those who have never played together. Once you get to know someone it is likely that unless you have something you'd really like to experience you can forego some negotiation for spontaneity.
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The core of BDSM is consent. No one will disagree with this. We are all aware, hopefully, that abuse is not consensual. If you feel that what is going on is ‘not right’ then you certainly should investigate if it is abuse or not. Some of what you may feel could not be abuse at all, but it’s good to know for sure. Learn how you can see the differences for yourself.
Read The Series | Find SimilarTopping from the bottom is a misunderstood term in BDSM, especially if you are a novice. Topping from the bottom is when you simultaneously adopt both roles. This could be in the form of giving commands, refusing requests or moving to control the location of impacts during play. Generally, it is frowned upon to try to force the Dominant’s hand to do something they do not wish to do.
Read The Series | Find SimilarOne of the hidden jewels on this site is an e-Zine that ran on Yahoo Groups back when I first started exploring submission. It has since stopped production but the articles it contained are still valuable and worth a read so I thought I ‘d bring them back to the forefront. They’ve been archived here with the editor’s permission since the site was first created but I don’t think many of you know just how wonderful they are. I encourage you to check them out!
Read The Series | Find SimilarToday I'd like to talk about the bane of many a submissive; fidgeting. Sitting still is really hard for me in many situations. Either nerves or discomfort will cause you to twitch and move when all you want to do is not move. So how do you learn how to cut down your fidgeting?
Read The Article | Find SimilarEvery submissive I know, including myself, hate to get into trouble, but it's going to happen. We have to admit that there will be times of backsliding, pushing limits and general disobedience in our learning. It's a part of growth. Don't think of punishment as something bad, but as something to help us grow inward.
Read The Article | Find SimilarLet's cover what a safe environment looks like from the people present at the physical location you choose to talk in. A good environment takes planning and mutual agreements to work the way it's supposed to. And you thought that you just had to say, "We need to talk," right?
Read The Article | Find SimilarWe spend so much time and energy making sure our Sir's and Mistress' are happy that sometimes we forget to attend to the most important part of us: ourselves.
Read The Article | Find SimilarThe nervous energy attached to meeting a Dominant for the first time doesn’t go away for everyone. If you know a few tips and ways to calm your nerves before the big date, you’ll feel relaxed and ready to put your best foot forward.
Read The Article | Find SimilarScared to have sex after a previous severe injury - Kayla gives this reader some advice.
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