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Content related to "A Mental Predicament: Balancing Wants and Needs"

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The Emotional Side of Sub Drop and Why It Happens More In Committed Relationships

There is a more intense side of Sub Drop that gets very little attention because for each person it is different and describing how to recover can take many forms. If not cared for, you could go into depression just from one play session. The endorphins and other hormones released during play leave your body in such a way that it takes the time to rebuild the balance of hormones in your system. You could feel like you have a hang over or partied too hard the night before, you could feel lost and depressed for hours or days.

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Leading and Supportive Love

Chris Lyon has written a fantastic book that does a great job describing and detailing the two roles of a leading and supportive relationship without all the kink, discipline and fetish mumbo jumbo that tends to muddy our understanding when we get involved in BDSM.

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What Everybody Ought To Know About Basic Needs and Need Deficits

The next time you take a look at your needs list, make a note of how important that need is. You can always scale them so that you can make sure your base needs are being met. Never settle for less than what you require. Submissives have needs too, make sure yours get met.

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Submissive and Slave: A Personal View

Some say the difference between a submissive and a slave has nothing whatever to do with how much control one gives up or how submissive one is. That it's in one's actions. In the way the slave obeys without question or hesitation. In the respect in the slave's voice when he or she speaks with his or her owner. In the way the slave knows what the owner needs almost before the owner does. But I've known some submissives to show their dominants more respect than some slaves show their owners.

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Why The Prince Charming Dominant Doesn't Exist

It's funny to me to see people wanting a Dominant but then looking for "chemistry" as well. They want to fall in love with the Dominant of their dreams. Apparently, these submissives have come into the lifestyle thinking that a Dominant is BDSMs version of Prince Charming. Ladies, He simply doesn't exist either in the Vanilla world or in the lifestyle. Most Doms I know have regular lives to live and when their backside itches they scratch it. They fart when they eat beans and burp when they drink a beer. They wake up with bags under their eyes and a 5 o'clock shadow just exactly like their vanilla counterparts. But here we are hoping like crazy that he will forever and ever look like a hottie in leathers while always having a desire to flog our submissive little behinds.

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Single In The Scene Part VI: Vulnerability

I’m of the opinion that there are many slaves who are unowned for one reason: fear of being vulnerable. I believe with all my being that if we don’t start reconciling ourselves with vulnerability, what we give in regards to service will come more from the surface than the core.

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A Day in the Life - Autumn

Autumn's tale of a typical day in her life. This is part of the Day in the Life series here on the site where you too can share your typical day with other submissives.

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I'm So Clumsy! Is There Anything I Can Do?

I would love to know if there is anything my master can do for me and if there is anything I can do for myself to help me stop being so clumsy.

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Jealousy and Mono/Poly Relationships

Here's what has helped Mina learn about jealousy in a mono/poly relationship - it just might help you too.

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BDSM and Kids: Handling the Role of Parent and Submissive

When you’re a parent, the switch between roles is more frequent and more exhausting. It’s important to realize, though, that it’s normal, and with a few tips and tricks, you can handle the transitions between submissive life and parenting life.

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