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A Complete Guide to BDSM Collars

A collar for submissives is one of the most fundamental symbols of their relationship and one that is usually gaurded and protected with their heart. With all the essays online about collars I thought I’d jump in with my own take on what everyone says and believes about collars.

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Expectations of a Collar: How Ready Are You to Accept One?

When do you know you are ready for a collar? What's the value in a collar really? And how can you get one?

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Kink and Mental Health

Being an emotionally healthy person is a goal that all of us have but a smaller margin actually accomplish. With the constant stress of commitments and modern day obligations, our emotions face the brunt of it. The goal of a submissive is to seek that balance in emotional states so that our service appears stress-free and sincere; even if we have a lot going on in the background. Living as an emotionally healthy submissive takes knowing what is considered healthy to begin with.

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I Need Help Finding a Mentor

I was wondering how I can get a submissive mentor? I'd like to talk about things with someone that has experience. I am on fetlife but I don't love posting things where everyone can see. Can you help me find someone?

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Should There Be Clear Definitions to Label Yourself In This Lifestyle?

So should there be a solid set of definitions that people can choose from? Other than the dictionary definitions that is; something lifestyle related that we can point to and say if you fit into a, b and c you are submissive, but if you feel more like d, e and f you are slave. If we had to come up with specific definitions what would be in your list for each label?

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What are Dress Protocols?

A dress protocol is established by a Dominant as the way a submissive is to present themselves for any specific situation. These can be basic grooming habits to very precise details to what to wear to dinner or bed. A lot of times these are the first rules established in a relationship. These can start out as directions for when and what to keep shaved, how to care for your hair, or if you can wear panties or not.

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Limits: Drawing That Line In The Sand

Applying limits to your BDSM experience is necessary for negotiation purposes in play and in relationships. It's like a compatibility scale. The more items on the limit list that match the more likely you are to be compatible and have fun playing in the same way. Being a novice isn't a hindrance for everyone, some Dominants like to help a novice explore their limits.

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A Day in the Life - Autumn

Autumn's tale of a typical day in her life. This is part of the Day in the Life series here on the site where you too can share your typical day with other submissives.

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How I Help Our Finances Without Knowing the Numbers

I don't need to know the numbers to know that if we aren't eating out, the shopping list stays short, and we aren’t wasting the food that we are buying.

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BDSM Basics - How Do I Find Someone to Play With?

How to find someone to experiment with and maybe have a relationship with.

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