Oftentimes, with novice submissives, it is assumed that showing any sort of desire for something that was not suggested by the Dominant would be topping from the bottom. Let me tell you now, having desires and asking for them to be fulfilled is not topping from the bottom.
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Negotiation and consent are the primary ways BDSM is distinguished from abuse - they are essential parts of kinky play. But far too many people gloss over how important it is to be really good at negotiating so that you can have great kinky fun. And you want to have kinky fun, right?
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I've been following an epic thread on consent for months now, watching sadly as many of the comments devolve into dangerously magical thinking and wishing somebody would speak up, and say "Whoa. There's a point at which personal responsibility comes into play here."
Read The Article | Find SimilarNovice Dominants have a lot to learn, that is true. And who better to teach them than a submissive that has experienced submission?
Read The Article | Find SimilarBy setting our boundaries, we can ensure that we are navigating the ‘lifestyle’ waters as safely as possible. This is a personal responsibility that each of us have that is at its core about self preservation.
Read The Article | Find SimilarI should be accepting punishment for misbehavior and yet I'm getting turned on by the spanking or the evil stick that used to spell doom for my punishment and it starts to feel good. Now, what do I do?
Read The Article | Find SimilarOpening up an already unstable relationship is hard for everyone.
Read The Article | Find SimilarBut asking for what I want and raising concerns to him is topping from the bottom! No, no it's not. You do, in fact, have to tell them what you are thinking and feeling.
Read The Article | Find SimilarAmbrosio covers "cruising" in part 6 of this series on Leather protocol and etiquette. Take head of the warnings and tips for those casual experiences.
Read The Article | Find SimilarIn this part of Ambrosio's series, you learn all about Flagging, the Hanky code and Symbols or Rituals you can use to identify others interested in similar kinks and power exchange styles.
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