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Content related to "When Fantasy Collides with Reality: Weighing Expectations when Exploring Kink Fantasies"

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7 Things I Wish I'd Known When I Was New to BDSM

There is always time for a bit of education and knowledge before exploration. It can keep you safe, it can make you more aware, it can keep you safe and it can be fun. What 7 things did I learn that I wish I had known a LONG time ago?

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10 Tips to Make Moving In With Your Dominant (or vise-versa) Smooth and Easy

Many of the things we do when it comes to BDSM and D/s relationships seem to come faster than in a traditional relationship, so often we forget that the base of a D/s relationship is a traditional one. You are still two people that plan to cohabitate. With that comes decisions and plans, change and adjustment periods.

In the first list of tips, I want to give I'm going to cover the more basic 'vanilla' ideas that will make your submissive more comfortable as they move into your home. The second list is BDSM based tips that will hopefully start your relationship on a good footing now that you are living under the same roof.

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Using Ritual to Maintain and Define Power Exchange

No matter how you view your life, rituals can help define the power structures we choose for our relationships. Rituals can enrich power exchange by giving reinforcement, regularity, and depth to relationships in a unique and beautiful way.

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Discipline and Punishment

Discipline comes in all shapes and sizes.It is a part of molding a submissive’s behavior and making corrections when they step out of line. Punishment though is a different beast. Punishment is for very severe infractions. I consider this to be things that could be deal breakers or relationship-enders. Punishment of this caliber should be rare or not at all. These differences are discussed and explored in the following series.

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Submissive Positions

Submissive Positions are talked about all over like everyone is supposed to be doing them or something. Not every relationship is set up to provide that level of protocol and you should never expect a relationship to automatically have that. If you are interested in positions, ask your partner or prospective partner if they’d be interested before you go learning any. They may have preferences to how you should look and act. Following them is by far more important than learning about positions online (unless that is their direction).

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There Is No Such Thing as Vanilla Life When You Are 24/7

In many of the groups I frequent a common thread is how to keep the spark alive when vanilla life gets in the way of your 24/7 D/s or M/s relationship. These people feel overworked, stressed and taxed by the daily things that take up their day and they say that they are having problems staying connected as their roles dictate.

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Male Submission – The Worm

One common archetype of submissive men is the worm, a man who wants to be humiliated, degraded, and tormented as much as possible by most any and every dominant woman he encounters. Depending upon the male sub’s orientation, he may want to be treated this way by only dominant women, only dominant men, or regardless of gender.

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7 Myths of Grieving and Understanding Your Responses to Death

I would like to talk about ground rules for grieving, myths of grief and loss, the uniqueness of each person’s grief and symptoms of grief.

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Five Reasons Why You Shouldn't Manipulate Your Vanilla Man into Being a Dominant

People often misunderstand how relationship communication works because they may have had such poor examples or think that coercing or manipulating someone is par for the course.

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When Kinky isn't Sexy

Kink and sex are indistinguishable from each other: if something kinky ensues, something sexy is sure to follow. The reality is, however, that the two can, and sometimes should be separated.

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