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Hard and Soft Limits? The Sooner You Know About Them The Better

As a submissive, one of the first things you will be asked by almost every Dom/me is: what are your limits? You will encounter this sometimes in chat, in play, and when negotiating a relationship with a new Dom/me. If you are playing with a new Dom/me and aren’t asked this question, my advice is not to play with the person. I have heard Dom/mes say that They don’t play with safe words or limits because They know what They are doing. How can a Dom/me know if you have health issues or triggers or are just plain terrified of something unless you tell them?

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Using Ritual to Maintain and Define Power Exchange

No matter how you view your life, rituals can help define the power structures we choose for our relationships. Rituals can enrich power exchange by giving reinforcement, regularity, and depth to relationships in a unique and beautiful way.

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The Importance of Safety, Risk-Awareness and Consent in Pre-Scene BDSM Negotiation

Negotiation and consent are the primary ways BDSM is distinguished from abuse - they are essential parts of kinky play. But far too many people gloss over how important it is to be really good at negotiating so that you can have great kinky fun. And you want to have kinky fun, right?

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First Playtime Jitters and How to Arrive Prepared

Every submissive goes though it. You may be going through it now. Those butterflies in your stomach because you've just set a date for your first play session. Things are still so new and exciting. You don't know what to expect or how you will react to things. It's all so strange and foreign feeling. You aren't alone. Even the most experienced submissive can go through the butterflies before play, but there are ways to learn to relax and be a bit more prepared for what might happen at your first play session.

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How to Make the Most Out of Your Bedroom BDSM

Bedroom BDSM is the most common form of BDSM relationship there is. Let's talk about how to make your bedroom only BDSM relationship special.

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What's In a Name? Selecting a Scene Name You Can Live With

Choosing a scene name is one thing if it is only ever going to be used online, but it takes a bit more thinking about if you are going to refer to yourself as it in real life as well or use it as an introduction point at a munch or something like 'I'm ********* on FetLife'

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BDSM To Cure Insomnia

I am not a doctor or expert on health issues but I have found something which helps me get to sleep at night: BDSM! There are two ways I have found that BDSM helps me fall asleep at night.

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Your Responsibilities in Play - In and Out of a Relationship

The responsibility of a submissive doesn’t disappear at any time. You need to look out for yourself and learn to communicate effectively with those you wish to play with, whether it’s the first or 500th time you’ve done so.

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BDSM Basics: Staying Safe with SSC

Every new thing you try is full of risks, some you are willing to take and others you aren't. So knowing about the safety precautions that can save your mind and body are always a good thing.

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How to Turn BDSM Fantasy Into Reality - Taking What You've Read or Seen Into Your Bedroom

So, you've come here looking for how to make those fantasies and hot stories something real; something you can experience for yourself. Let's try to get your training wheels in place so you can go into your first conversation and foray into hot kinky sex with open eyes.

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