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BDSM Checklists

If you’ve just started out in BDSM and have asked a few questions, it is very likely that you have been directed to use a checklist to become familiar with what you may or may not like in play and roles and fetishes.A checklist can be very helpful for you when you are first starting out. You can learn what you might like to try and get answers to things you don’t know about. Some of the more detailed checklists can seem overwhelming but please realize that you don’t have to like everything. Pick and choose and be honest.

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Start Here: New to BDSM Pack

So, you’ve discovered this great big world of BDSM and you just don’t know what to do now. Welcome! I suggest you start here in learning some of the vocabulary you’ll find around the internet and I want to help you get your head around all the things you’ll encounter, just a bit at a time.

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Are Discipline and Punishment The Same?

Discipline and Punishment. The words are far from the same however some dynamics treat them the same. In fact, for the longest time, I have used the word punishment when I mean discipline. It’s even possible that Master has used these words interchangeably as well. I’ve done some thinking to try to sort out what these two words mean in our dynamic and how they are employed. I have a preference for clearly defined terms and boundaries so these two words are worth defining.

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The 6 Most Common STDs

Everytime we talk about sex and sexually related activities such as many of the BDSM and kinky play we do it's important, if not imperative, that we are safe and aware of the most common sexually transmitted diseases and infections you can get. You should have tests for STDs regularly if you choose to have multiple partners, or if you are changing partners. Maintaining a clean bill of sexual health will provide yourself and your partner(s) with reassurance and safety. Even though you may be disease free does not mean you shouldn't practice safe sex. If you need a refresher, check the previous post on safer kinky sex practices.

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The Anatomy of A BDSM Scene: What Happens?

Let me describe to you what a first scene might be like.

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How S&M Saved My Life

S&M became an almost therapeutic aspect of our relationship.

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Fifty Shades of Grey, Consent and the Media's Representation of Kink

Unfortunately, the 50 Shades of Grey series is the litmus test that the mainstream media will now use to judge what those of us in the community consider to be a huge part of who we are.

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But I Don't Like Pain! Learning to See the Eroticism in Pain as Pleasure

I can show you that pain is indeed something erotic when used correctly and in the right situations. Pain doesn't have to be painful, and other stimuli can be pleasurable and can either mask pain or enhance it.

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Resources For CBT (Cock and Ball Torture)

Some good resources for starting your own Cock and Ball Torture learning.

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Vaginal Fisting: How You Too Can Experience a Hand in the Bush

Fisting is amazing and incredible. It is something to be cautious about, but I don’t think it is necessary to fear it. Fisting is dangerous. But it can be a safer, saner and consensual activity. Other than hands: lube, communication skills, gloves, and patience are the necessary tools to move forward into the great divine. The only other factor is time.

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