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Content related to "Manners, Etiquette and Appropriateness When Interacting with People in the BDSM Scene"

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Submissive Positions

Submissive Positions are talked about all over like everyone is supposed to be doing them or something. Not every relationship is set up to provide that level of protocol and you should never expect a relationship to automatically have that. If you are interested in positions, ask your partner or prospective partner if they’d be interested before you go learning any. They may have preferences to how you should look and act. Following them is by far more important than learning about positions online (unless that is their direction).

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Lessons in Submissive Speech

Not long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.

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Simply Service e-Zine

One of the hidden jewels on this site is an e-Zine that ran on Yahoo Groups back when I first started exploring submission. It has since stopped production but the articles it contained are still valuable and worth a read so I thought I ‘d bring them back to the forefront. They’ve been archived here with the editor’s permission since the site was first created but I don’t think many of you know just how wonderful they are. I encourage you to check them out!

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Playing Well with Others

This book by Lee Harrington and Mollena Williams is the quintessential guide for novices and seasoned players ready to enter the BDSM community. No other book like this exists so it's a great addition to your personal kink library.

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Getting to Know the Local and Not so Local BDSM Community: Attending Munch Groups

One of the most feared activities of a novice is getting up the nerve to meet other people face to face. Yet this is one of the first things that I and many others recommend for those wishing to get into BDSM. I encourage people to learn all they want behind the comfort of a computer screen but to really taste things as they are, they need to get out and experience it.

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Your Kink is Not My Kink and That's Okay

Just because your kinks are things I'm not remotely interested in doesn't mean we can't stand on common ground. It's okay to be different and yet be friends. People do it all the time.

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Don't I Know You From Somewhere? - Encountering People You Know at a Munch

You might be recognized. That's right, there just might be someone there that you know from your life at these things. And that puts lead in so many boots. It doesn't have to be that way if you know how you want to handle that before you step out the door.

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How Protocol Develops in D/s Relationships

I'm going to cover the basics of protocol, some different types of protocol and then talk about how to develop your own protocol in your relationship.

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Entering the Community: Finding Other Local Kinksters Using Online Resources

The internet has opened you up to a world of possibility - including finding other kinky groups and people! Here's how you can collect a list of local meet-ups, groups, and interested persons.

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Play Nice: Some Notes on Scene Etiquette and Leather Protocol (Part 1 of 7) - General Principles

Ambrosio brings us a series of posts on Leather protocol and etiquette. In this introductory post, we touch on the very basics of manners and appropriate behavior in BDSM situations.

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