As a submissive, one of the first things you will be asked by almost every Dom/me is: what are your limits? You will encounter this sometimes in chat, in play, and when negotiating a relationship with a new Dom/me. If you are playing with a new Dom/me and aren’t asked this question, my advice is not to play with the person. I have heard Dom/mes say that They don’t play with safe words or limits because They know what They are doing. How can a Dom/me know if you have health issues or triggers or are just plain terrified of something unless you tell them?
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The core of BDSM is consent. No one will disagree with this. We are all aware, hopefully, that abuse is not consensual. If you feel that what is going on is ‘not right’ then you certainly should investigate if it is abuse or not. Some of what you may feel could not be abuse at all, but it’s good to know for sure. Learn how you can see the differences for yourself.
Read The Series | Find SimilarTo me there is quite a difference between being submissive and a slave. A submissive retains the power over themselves and their body. Many are not going to agree with me on this. I don't feel that discipline, true discipline should be put in place with a sub. If a submissive still has power over themselves then how can they really mess up to the point of punishment outside of play. Slaves on the other hand, particularly those who live it 24/7 sometimes need punishment just for the sake of training, being kept in line and as a reminder of their place.
Read The Article | Find SimilarWhen you are brand new to anything related to BDSM it is likely that you will not know many of your limits and that's okay. Make sure you are prepared to share that information if you want to play, but also to stop as soon as you think you've reached a limit.
Read The Article | Find SimilarThe checklist is a great tool to track the progression of your submission. Have you revisited your checklist lately?
Read The Article | Find SimilarMost of us have problems with really making the limit list a full picture of what your boundaries are and tend to stick with play activities.
Read The Article | Find SimilarHow are Endorphins related to play? Here's how Endorphins give you that happy pain blocking effect as well as euphoria.
Read The Article | Find SimilarOvercoming limits is a part of the journeys we take as subs. It’s a healthy, often invigorating challenge.
Read The Article | Find SimilarThere's a lot you can do to learn about BDSM and what your limits might be.
Read The Article | Find SimilarThe only true limitations are those fundamental values that you carry at your core. The inviolate lines that you will not cross for to do so you believe would compromise who you believe yourself to be. That final line in the sand.
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