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Lessons in Submissive Speech

Not long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.

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Is It Cheating When It's Online?

Cheating is a big nasty word. It conjures distrust, fear, and doubt in a relationship. It means that someone has violated the negotiated boundaries of the relationship. But is it cheating if the offenses happened online?

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What Is Polyamory Anyway?

Polyamorous relationships take many forms and can include many different levels of intimacy. In many ways, polyamory is whatever you want it to be. But what it must be is honest, loving and accepting. The rest is up to you…

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Let’s Party! Finding Local Play Parties

Parties are a ‘rite of passage’ for some in the BDSM community. How do you find one? What can you expect? And most importantly (for me) what on earth can you wear?

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The Anatomy of A BDSM Scene: What Happens?

Let me describe to you what a first scene might be like.

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Where Can I Find Like-minded Friends w/ Herpes?

I have genital herpes, and it deters most people. Do you have any tips for a young woman looking for a group of like-minded kinksters?

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How to Deal With the Question of Being Kinky and a Parent

Confusion or being judgmental - clearing the air on why you can, in fact, be a great parent and still be kinky.

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Why Your Sexual Needs Matter in a D/s Relationship (or ANY Relationship)

Other than fulfilling pleasure, your sexual needs are just as important as any other needs you have in a relationship; from love or happiness, trust and honesty, being taken care of or anything else you've determined is a need for you in a relationship.

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4 Ways to Reignite Passion When You Are Suffering From Stale Sex

There are things you can do to reignite the passion when your sex has grown stale.

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What Traditional Submissives can Learn from Hypnosis Fetishists

The hypnosis fetish, however, is relatively new. And because of its newness, traditional submissives sometimes dismiss hypnosis as unnecessary or a cheat. But hypnofetishists have learned a lot about sex and relationships in the past twenty years. And traditionalists could learn something from us: the importance of rapport.

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