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What's The Big Deal With BDSM Checklists?

For a novice submissive exploring SM, a checklist can open up a world of fantasies or scare you right back into your light kink and rough sex. Checklists are not meant to scare you or overwhelm you, but I've seen lists that are more like lists of all sorts of rare fetishes and extreme play that only a few ever explore. Why you would want or need that on a novice checklist is beyond me.

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Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns

There is no wonder why so many people recommend this book as one of the first books for someone just starting out in BDSM. It has everything you could wish for in a complete overview of BDSM book.

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Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of a Predator Dom/me Part 2

Once you start in training you have a better chance to evaluate your new Dom/me. Is the Dom creating a positive learning environment, or does s/he make you feel that you are constantly failing his/her orders? Was it really a newbie mistake, or is there a lack of training that is causing the failure? Submission can easily set up a feeling of need and dependency on the Dom/me.

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The Abuse Debate: A Matter of Acceptance Not Consent

BDSM relationships make the argument on abuse much more complicated than it already is, and those in TPE relationship have an even harder time than that. For non-kinky people, it's pretty easy to define abuse. How do you define abuse if the way the dictionary defines it just does not apply to you?

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Are Female Dominants More About Mental Dominance Than Physical Dominance?

Since I’m writing from the male submissive point of view, I suppose this question might also be asked as, “Is male submission more mental than physical?” I find the question, no matter how you parse it, to be interesting largely because it’s something I never really considered before. I suppose the implied idea is that the female dominants somehow exert their control vis-à-vis more cerebral or psychological means whereas the men tend toward more physical means.

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A Day in the Life: DarlingDoll

This is part of the A Day in the Life Series. Thanks DarlingDoll!

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Is It Possible to Live as a Slave 24/7?

The best I can hope for each day, every day is to serve Him faithfully and to the best of my abilities and to love Him unconditionally. I don't lose sight of my place with Him, and we manage a 24/7 lifestyle just fine.

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The Need for Speed - The Desperation of Some Dominants

Why some ill-experienced Dominants only seek novice submissives and how you can protect yourself from them.

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Entering the Community: Who You'll Meet and What You Can Expect at a Play Party/BDSM Dungeon

What is it like at a play party? I'm going to tell you! Come learn who you'll meet and what you'll see (and do) while there.

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The 100/100 Rule: Why TPE Succeeds

50/50 isn't the balance of a TPE relationship. Each role gives 100%.

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