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BDSM Myths

The world is full of false truths. These false truths tend to be the assumptions of the uninformed or the beliefs of those who want to scare novices out of their wits. Many of these are because of a narrow view of the world or an inability to accept varying viewpoints. In this series, you’ll find some of the most popular BDSM myths that novices hear and what the truth really is.

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Define This! Punishment and Funishment

In this video series, I define terms that readers have asked me about! This one is the comparison of funishment and punishment. Do you have a term you'd like defined? Let me know.

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The Posh Girl's Guide to Play

Sure she has some creative ideas on how to play out scenes, but she won't get my support for this book.

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Start Here: Don't Begin Exploring BDSM Until You've Read the Basics

There are so many primers out there about BDSM I'm not sure if another one is really needed. Then again with all the basic questions asked on forums and chat rooms about BDSM it's unlikely that my words will not be read by someone and that they will take something new from them.

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Psychological Aspects of Consensual Rape in BDSM Scenarios

"Consensual rape." Quite an oxymoron, I suppose. Rape, by definition, is sexual intercourse in which one party is unwilling and unwanting of the attention and act. A consensual act is something quite contrary to that initial concept of rape. A consensual act is one in which all parties are in agreement as to the parameters, activities, and boundaries of said act. How then, does the term "consensual rape" have any validity at all?

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Submissive vs. Slave

Mistress Steel tackles the submissive vs slave debate. Core differences and misconceptions are revealed.

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Everyone Needs a Break, Right - Do you Break from Submission?

While I can't say that everyone takes a break it's good to know that we can without it being the end of our submission altogether. I hope you will forever remain happy, on whatever phase of submission you are currently in.

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Domifriends: The Best of Both Worlds

In the Vanilla World, we refer to boyfriends and girlfriends and everyone understands what we’re talking about. If you’re not in a public D/s relationship, describing your Dom/me can be a bit challenging.

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Personal Safety Mantra: Safe Sane and Consensual (SSC)

What is SSC? It's a credo that people in the BDSM community use to express the safety tenets of play.

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My First Anticipatory Service and 3 Lessons It Taught Me

In essence, anticipatory service is about being able to see patterns in the procedure, and it can be difficult to track patterns across a wide array of your Dominant’s vocational, recreational, and habitual tendencies. If you have just one aspect to focus on it, increases your ability to observe and retain their pattern of doing things in that area so you can help them through their day efficiently with anticipatory service.

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