Processing Pain and Being a Masochist

Being that I’m a masochist, I love pain. I’ve never really thought about it or analyzed what that means really, but reading other people’s blogs has always helped me see that saying I’m masochist is just another huge personal term in BDSM as a whole. So, to think it though, this is what being a masochist means to me. I eroticize pain.

Some Thoughts on Domestic Service from a Male Submissive

When luna indicated that she was going to emphasize domestic service at the Sub Guide this month, it reminded me that when I tell people I am primarily a service submissive I am frequently asked: “What is that?”. The follow-up question is often, “What do you get out of that?” It seemed an opportune time to tackle these questions. (Sometimes the follow-up question is “What are you secondarily, then?” To which I always reply, “Whatever She needs me to be, of course.”)

So what is a service submissive? Simply put, it’s a sub (male or female) that takes care of household chores and similar tasks. Cooking, cleaning and other domestic duties might be performed by a service submissive. We essentially take the role of butler, maid, chauffeur, gardener or cook.

The Curse of Masochism

I very very often HATE that I’m a masochist.

Can We Move to 24/7 D/s Even If We Have Issues?

How and where can we start advancing our relationship with the many challenges we have?

How Do I Let Him Know I'd Like Some Attention?

I want some attention to just an acknowledgment that he knows I exist. Or is wanting that out of line with being submissive?

You're Not the Boss of Me! Empowerment Through Submission

Even though I am not currently in a D/s relationship, it’s important for me to always remember that I don’t have to submit to anyone.

The Art of Apology: Knowing When to Apologize

How do you know when you owe someone an apology? Continuing kallista's series on apologizing with knowing when an apology is necessary.

BDSM and Kids: Getting Kinky With Kids Around

Over the past few years, Kayla found certain things help her feel submissive, enjoy kinky sex, and even have BDSM scenes as a parent. Here's some tips for your own playtime.

BDSM and Kids: When Kids Ask Awkward Questions

As a kinkster, there’s a chance that, eventually, they’ll see or hear something and ask you about it. You’ve answered questions about poop, penises, and what those ducks were doing to one another in the park (or was that just me?). You’ve got this.

How Do I Let Him Know I'm Committed to Him?

How can I tell my partner that I'm not going anywhere and am interested in a long term relationship and possibly marriage?