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7 Things I Wish I'd Known When I Was New to BDSM

There is always time for a bit of education and knowledge before exploration. It can keep you safe, it can make you more aware, it can keep you safe and it can be fun. What 7 things did I learn that I wish I had known a LONG time ago?

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Series

D/s Breakups

The breakup of a relationship is a difficult time for those involved. It is fraught with emotion and frustration. It makes it even more painful when the lines of trust are cemented like those in a D/s relationship. Likened to going through a period of grief you are sure to experience an array of feelings that can vary from fear, anger, rage, and denial. Seek comfort and help in the following articles.

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What Should You Do When Your Wants or Needs Aren't Met?

Unfortunately, there are times where needs or wants can't be filled by the person you are with.

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How Rules In a D/s Relationship Can Have a Positive Effect on Your Submission

Rules, instructions and assignments are things that are given to me by my Dominant for very important reasons. To follow them should bring me the pride and happiness that I feel for him, and remind me that he cares for me. Rules are in place to keep me in line, place my heart and mind in the submissive mindset, and to make sure that I hold myself in his honor.

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Why Rules Provide Structure to D/s (and M/s) Relationships

I'm a submissive that needs structure. Submissives all around will identify with either discipline, obedience, structure or rules or perhaps more than one. With structure can come rules and that's how my submission runs in our dynamic.

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The Challenges of Being Kajira in Today’s Society

The challenges are being able to live and be who you are without having to justify yourself to every fucking stranger – and family – because your lifestyle and relationship dynamic doesn’t fit modern day societal norms we have had rammed down our throats every single day since we were born.

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What to Expect When Attending a Munch

Why should you attend a munch? This is often the first step in exploring the BDSM lifestyle in real life, rather than online. You can meet people, make contacts, ask questions, and just enjoy your time out without worrying about keeping your secret desires secret any longer. This is most often the place where cross dressers can ‘come out’, so to speak, and appear in make up and outfits that reflect their lifestyle, without negative comments.

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Emotional Dependency in D/s Relationships

This necessary attachment can develop into a positive reinforcing factor in the relationship or it can lead to a one-sided worship of one of the partners that can fracture the foundation.

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Some Misconceptions about the Caregiver/Little Dynamic

Debunking some misconceptions of the Caregiver dynamic.

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Play Nice: Some Notes on Scene Etiquette and Leather Protocol (Part 1 of 7) - General Principles

Ambrosio brings us a series of posts on Leather protocol and etiquette. In this introductory post, we touch on the very basics of manners and appropriate behavior in BDSM situations.

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