The idea of orgasm control or denial strikes fears in novice submissives. "What do you mean give over my ability to orgasm whenever I want?" Sure you could think of it that way, but in terms of your submission it could mean so much more.
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Scheduling your time, prioritizing your goals, and optimizing your day, are highly personal pursuits, and more of a subjective art than a universal science.
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By taking on an active role in our submission, we not only have more opportunities to be submissive, but we build a dynamic that provides an open exchange of power. Even though as submissives, we permit them to have authority over us, that isn't enough. We're missing a key point here. D/s is an exchange.
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Anyone can learn to be a good service submissive, even if you don't feel you are a people pleaser, because the key traits are all ones that can be learned and refined. When you take steps to improve yourself now, you'll be able to tackle a variety of service challenges and refine the services you wish to provide for your Dominant.
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I've been following an epic thread on consent for months now, watching sadly as many of the comments devolve into dangerously magical thinking and wishing somebody would speak up, and say "Whoa. There's a point at which personal responsibility comes into play here."
Read The Article | Find SimilarIt is a scary proposition to approach your partner who may be oblivious to your new desires about wanting to add a bit or a lot of kink to your relationship. Whatever they decide it’s up to you on how you proceed. If they want to give it a try – go ahead! If they are far from interested you still have avenues available to you. It doesn’t automatically mean the end of the relationship.
Read The Series | Find SimilarHow many times have you heard a submissive say how he/she loves to be told they are a "good girl/boy" by their dominant? Yet how many times have any of them been able to pin point the why of the effect it has on them? I have a theory.
Read The Article | Find SimilarA Dominant has limits just like submissives do. There are things that don’t interest them, or that they have a moral or ethical standing that will prevent them from exploring something. Over the years I have heard many times that Dominants should have a checklist also and I agree.
Read The Article | Find SimilarJealousy, unfortunately, is a recurrent emotion, even after years of a relationship. You cannot keep it from popping up now and then, but you can prepare yourself for its arrival.
Read The Article | Find SimilarI'm wondering if you have any advice for how to look after your dom long distance?
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