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Content related to "What is the "Spirit of the Rule""

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Topping from the Bottom

Topping from the bottom is a misunderstood term in BDSM, especially if you are a novice. Topping from the bottom is when you simultaneously adopt both roles. This could be in the form of giving commands, refusing requests or moving to control the location of impacts during play. Generally, it is frowned upon to try to force the Dominant’s hand to do something they do not wish to do.

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Lessons in Submissive Speech

Not long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.

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Start Here: New to BDSM Pack

So, you’ve discovered this great big world of BDSM and you just don’t know what to do now. Welcome! I suggest you start here in learning some of the vocabulary you’ll find around the internet and I want to help you get your head around all the things you’ll encounter, just a bit at a time.

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A Switch of the D/s Lifestyle

When I was finally more aware of the community, there was a lot of negative attitudes toward switches. It was thought they had no clear idea about if they wanted to be, submissive or dominant. And “Why can’t they make up their mind?” sort of an attitude.

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What are Dress Protocols?

A dress protocol is established by a Dominant as the way a submissive is to present themselves for any specific situation. These can be basic grooming habits to very precise details to what to wear to dinner or bed. A lot of times these are the first rules established in a relationship. These can start out as directions for when and what to keep shaved, how to care for your hair, or if you can wear panties or not.

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How to Create a Morning Ritual to Streamline Your Routine

Morning rituals are fantastic ways of setting routine and developing a focusing meditation bright and early in the day. I've had morning rituals off an on throughout my service and they are quite enjoyable. I've not maintained one since I became a stay at home submissive and certainly this would be a good time to recreate one, I think.

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Massage as Ritual

It can be a hand rub, a back rub or a full body massage. The ritual part is that it's done regularly and with reverence to the act. It becomes a special moment in time for you and your partner. You get to absorb yourself in your service and they get to receive a relaxing massage.

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Being Fully Present: Slowing Down to Live in the Moment

To be fully present in the moment, not thinking about what is next. What a gift I can give to my Dominant - my full and undivided attention in every moment and to be more in tune with His needs.

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Why Your Sexual Needs Matter in a D/s Relationship (or ANY Relationship)

Other than fulfilling pleasure, your sexual needs are just as important as any other needs you have in a relationship; from love or happiness, trust and honesty, being taken care of or anything else you've determined is a need for you in a relationship.

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Help! My Dominant Says and Does Things I Didn't Agree To

My Dominant is constantly changing the rules of the relationship and I don't agree with them. I love him and don't want to give him up but I am starting to question if he ever really loved me at all?

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