Safety

This post was going to be a video post but since I’m working off of my little netbook for the time being (my laptop died) I was unable to create the video. I promise to get back to doing videos when I have a new laptop. In a play party last night I witnessed a [...]

Because of the content of this post I feel I must begin with a disclaimer: This is NOT meant to be medical advice or anything even related to it. This is an account of what worked for me and my family and notes from other pregnant slaves I have known. Always talk to your doctor [...]

This is a guest post by Camryn Darkstone. Virtual worlds have opened a door to BDSM for many people, allowing them to explore their curiosity about it in a fantasy environment. People who would never do so in “real” life can try on handcuffs, be chained and bound, and even submit to a Dominant, all [...]

This is a guest post by SherynB. Please take the time to read the whole thing. It’s an important issue that needs to be addressed. Okay, there’s a 600lb gorilla in the room, and I’m done pretending it’s not there. What we do isn’t pretty or politically correct, and frankly, it’s dangerous if we can’t get (and [...]

When Master and I play, it’s very likely that there will be marks, at least temporarily. Caring for them is part of the aftercare we have set up for me.  We are pretty minimal when it comes to first aid for them because I like to keep them as long as possible.  I’m the sort [...]

We never want our scene time to end. It’s fun and pleasant and lovely. When we play we have a chance that the blissful time we are experiencing will end well or may end suddenly from something unexpected. Yes we do everything we can to avoid having to stop play but when sudden illness takes [...]

I’ve talked about safewords here before. I believe they are very important for new relationships and when new activities are being introduced. A stop word is a brake in the play; one that typically halts play completely, but can also be one where slowing down is the direction. Yes there are people who don’t use safewords and [...]

When your body overloads on adrenaline or endorphins you can reach a high that many call subspace. It doesn’t happen to everyone, nor does it happen every single time you play. Sometimes it can happen if you are  in an erotic exchange but not playing. You need to know what you should and shouldn’t do [...]

This video post answers a question I got recently about the line between punishment and abuse. A year ago I did a post about BDSM and abuse and in it gave you an idea of what the difference was between consensual BDSM and abuse. A couple weeks ago I was asked if there was a [...]

When you’ve decided to venture out on a blind date with a prospective Dominant you’ll likely want to set up a safe call. A safe call is someone that is aware you are on a date, who you are with and what to do if you don’t call on time. It’s a check in, plain [...]

How many of you post pictures on the Internet of your BDSM? On maybe FetLife, Flickr, or your own blog? It has been something I have done from the very beginning. For a long time though I really was not comfortable with showing my face in any fetish pictures since i was partly worried about [...]

What are limits? As a submissive, one of the first things you will be asked by almost every Dom/me is: what are your limits? You will encounter this sometimes in chat, in play, and when negotiating a relationship with a new Dom/me. If you are playing with a new Dom/me and aren’t asked this question, [...]

Many of the BDSM activities we may engage in are inherently sexual in nature, even if no sex actually occurs. Being aware and using safe sex barriers when necessary is your protection from disease and infection. I’m amazed with casual play partners that don’t employ these simple techniques to protect themselves and future partners.  But [...]

Everytime we talk about sex and sexually related activities such as many of the BDSM and kinky play we do it’s important, if not imperative, that we are safe and aware of the most common sexually transmitted diseases and infections you can get. You should have tests for STDs regularly if you choose to have [...]

From the Submissive Guide Newsletter 3/3/10 Being in the BDSM community for any length of time you are likely to come across the common sermons of SSC, Safe Calls and First Meeting Safety. When you are novice in BDSM I’d encourage you to listen to these sermons and listen hard; they could protect you as [...]

Did you miss part 1? You can read it here. In Part 1, we looked at the information that you should try to gather when starting to interact with an unknown Dom/me. However, there are other warning signs that can appear once you start to develop a relationship with your new Dom/me. Evaluating your training [...]

Part 1: Information Please! If you’re a new submissive this lifestyle may seem overwhelming at first. A submissive I know terms it ‘the new submissive smell’. Dom/mes sense ‘new blood’, and swarm like piranhas to interact with, play with or train the new submissive in the group. Dom/mes may contact you online or meet you [...]

I said before I’m a “no limits” slave.  Bring on the barrage of “What if your master wanted to cut your arm off?” type questions. There are few scenarios related to what most would consider safe and sane kink that I will attempt to avoid, but when it comes right down to it, if The [...]

This video post is about what not to share on your online profile. We all have one somewhere. FetLife being all the rage right now, but also we have alt.com, collarme.com, bondage.com and others where we place ads and identity profiles up to get people interested. This interest can be friends or relationship related; it [...]

I’ve always believed that safewords are only good if you know how to use them. Good ole communication is great for things like numb limbs, an itch you can’t reach or a bathroom break.  Submissive Guide is here for novices and it’s always good to teach about safewords and recommend that you have one. In [...]