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Relationships

Learn about relationship dynamics and joining two people into a D/s couple

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The Art of Apology: Receiving an apology when you don’t think one is necessary

The Art of Apology: Receiving an apology when you don’t think one is necessary

Maybe you know a frequent apologizer, or maybe you’ve been surprised, but at some point in your life, you’ve probably had someone tell you, “Hey, I’m sorry!” and your immediate response was, “What on earth are you apologizing for?” If you’re like me, and you completely lack a brain-to-mouth filter, your reaction probably came tumbling [...]

Leave a comment Posted by kallista | Posted in: Relationships
Ask lunaKM – Afraid of Long Distance Dom

Ask lunaKM – Afraid of Long Distance Dom

Dear Annie, I am in a dom/sub relationship long distance, One that has become very stressful for me. I am punished it seems like every day to stay in favor and because of the distance, it is monetary payment. It is breaking me down financially and mentally, it seems I get nothing from this relationship. [...]

3 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything, Relationships, Safety
Ask the Readers – In Poly, do all partners have other partners?

Ask the Readers – In Poly, do all partners have other partners?

Dear lunaKM, I am researching the poly lifestyle. I am looking for opinions on whether or not poly means both sides of the slash should be able to have other partners. Is there any iron clad rule about that? Thank you. There is no iron clad rule about any relationship style. If the partners all [...]

5 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything, Relationships
The Top 5 Tips for Vetting a Potential Dominant Partner

The Top 5 Tips for Vetting a Potential Dominant Partner

from the Submissive Guide Newsletter 4/2/16 The most common search queries on this blog have to do with finding a Dominant partner so I have to assume that a lot of you who read here are single and searching for your Dominant. It’s never easy being single and knowing you want to find a Dominant [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Newsletter Archive, Relationships
Mama Vi Then and Now, right image courtesy of Mama Vi Johnson; left image courtesy of C. Creane Images; and edited by blyss

Aging in the Lifestyle: Doing it with Grace

When I first came to the community, I, as well as others like me, was a bit of a unicorn. During that time, it wasn’t the norm to see younger people in the community – younger as in under 36 or so. Most of the people I knew were 40+, and there I was in [...]

The 100/100 Rule: Why TPE Succeeds

The 100/100 Rule: Why TPE Succeeds

There is plenty of questioning the 24/7 TPE M/s dynamic. Is it healthy? Is it even realistically possible? I wanted to share my thoughts on why it is not only healthy and realistic in real world application, but it creates incredibly happy and successful relationships. So quickly it has become the standard and expectation of [...]

4 comments Posted by Mrs. Darling | Posted in: Relationships
Ask Submissive Guide: Trying Again

Ask Submissive Guide: Trying Again

Hi Submissive Guide My Dominant and I are trying to get our relationship going in the right direction again. We have been married for 23 years and in an M/s relationship for the past 4 years. In the beginning he read everything and was involved and it was everything I dreamed it would be but [...]

Leave a comment Posted by Kayla Lords | Posted in: Ask Anything, Relationships
Dealing With Submissive Burnout

Dealing With Submissive Burnout

There are times where I don’t feel like being a slave. I look around the apartment and see what needs to be done, dishes, laundry, dinner prep, grocery shopping and I think to myself I really don’t wanna do any of it. Daddy will give me errands to run and even though I’m nodding my [...]

2 comments Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: Mindset, Relationships
Stress Overpowering the Dynamic – Submissive Mediation Monday

Stress Overpowering the Dynamic – Submissive Mediation Monday

I’m devoting this Monday to meditation, reflection and devotion to submission. I hope to select topics that will get you thinking differently about some part of your life or submission and then just maybe grow a little bit further. If you have ideas for topics that might work for a Meditation Monday, please email me. We all can handle [...]

2 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Relationships
Feeling Like a Failure as a Slave

Feeling Like a Failure as a Slave

Dinner time at our house is 6 PM. In my opinion, it’s like the perfect time. Not too early, gives Daddy and I a couple of hours to catch up on our TV shows or to watch a movie and afterwards gives us time to do our own thing before bed. I’m usually very good [...]

5 comments Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: Mindset, Personal Growth, Relationships
8 Secrets for Supporting a Stressed Dominant Partner

8 Secrets for Supporting a Stressed Dominant Partner

from the Submissive Guide Newsletter 1-23-16 Stress comes in many forms. Perhaps your partner is having trouble at work. Or maybe he’s caring for his aging parents. Or perhaps there’s tension between your Dominant and an extended family member or close friend. Or maybe your Dominant is sick, suffering from a health problem or concern. [...]

3 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Relationships, Service
You Are Not Your Collar – Submissive Meditation Monday

You Are Not Your Collar – Submissive Meditation Monday

I’m devoting this Monday to meditation, reflection and devotion to submission. I hope to select topics that will get you thinking differently about some part of your life or submission and then just maybe grow a little bit further. If you have ideas for topics that might work for a Meditation Monday, please email me. Don’t lose yourself [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Relationships, Views & More...

[Video Post] Adding Rules in a D/s (or M/s) Relationship

Disclaimer: I’m well aware that some relationships do not have rules for the submissive/slave to follow. This talk will be about the relationships that use rules and task lists for submissive behavior and expectation. Many D/s relationships start by establishing a few ground rules for the submissive to follow. It is one of the more [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Relationships, Video Posts
Sample Consensual “Slavery” Contract

Sample Consensual “Slavery” Contract

Author Unknown NOTE: It should go without saying that a “contract” such as this is not legally binding. Documents such as these are intended only to provide a fantasy environment for extended role-playing or to establish a D/s or M/s relationship. They are also not obligatory and one should not expect to have to sign [...]

1 comment Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: Relationships
How Often Have You Said: “I Don’t Know What’s Expected of Me, But I’d Like To”?

How Often Have You Said: “I Don’t Know What’s Expected of Me, But I’d Like To”?

from the Submissive Guide Newsletter 8/29/15 What ARE you expected to do and know as a submissive? Well, for many who are just starting out, the answer really is not much. But that’s not the kind of answer you accept out of me, right? There’s more to it, isn’t there? Of course there always is, [...]

5 Myths About Dominants

5 Myths About Dominants

For the record, I am not a Dominant (and I don’t play one on TV) but I love a Dominant man, and I have learned a lot about him in our time together. There are plenty of misconceptions about BDSM, and Dominants are no exception. There’s no such thing as a perfect Dominant or a [...]

6 comments Posted by Kayla Lords | Posted in: BDSM Fundamentals, Relationships
Ethical BDSM Falls on Both Sides of the Slash

Ethical BDSM Falls on Both Sides of the Slash

A few months ago, there was a thread started on Fetlife about ethical BDSM and it really caught my attention so I had to check it out. At this time there were only a handful of comments and every one of these comments had said something pertaining to the dominant being responsible for the relationship [...]

2 comments Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Relationships, Views & More...
Ask Submissive Guide: New Relationships and Body Image

Ask Submissive Guide: New Relationships and Body Image

Thank you Mrs. Darling for answering this reader’s question! Dear Submissive Guide, I’m hoping you can offer some advice to a newbie.  I’ve met a Dom online, we had a first date (just lunch) and will be meeting again shortly to negotiate a contract. I have never ever done this before.  I’m overweight and over [...]

4 comments Posted by Mrs. Darling | Posted in: Ask Anything, Relationships
D/s with Family Around

D/s with Family Around

This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Perhaps one of the most challenging decisions we face as a parent is what we should tell our children, when and how much. By choosing to live within the D/s or BDSM lifestyle [...]

1 comment Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: Community, Relationships
Ask Submissive Guide – Taking Care of Your Dominant from a Distance

Ask Submissive Guide – Taking Care of Your Dominant from a Distance

Thank you Kayla Lords for answering this question for a reader! Dear lunaKM, I’m starting to enter a long distance d/s relationship as a sub. You have a lot of excellent articles about self aftercare for subs in ldrs, which I’ve made good use of, but I’m wondering if you have any advice for how [...]

1 comment Posted by Kayla Lords | Posted in: Ask Anything, Relationships
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