Mentoring, self-help and submissive exploration

Play and Sex

Explore the different ways to serve during those BDSM playtime moments.

BDSM Basics View All

Ask lunaKM – New to BDSM, where do I find Information?

Me and my boy friend have recently become interested in a D/s relationship I want more information but I’m not sure where to look. Knowing where to start can be difficult when you don’t know a whole lot about BDSM. You have at least taken a good first step by encountering Submissive Guide and there [...]

20, May | Leave a comment

A Personal Story About Discovering and Testing Limits

This is a guest post by MermaidHooked. The scene is built upon personal limitations and the ability to be self-aware in the midst of dangerous situations we willingly put ourselves in for the goal of receiving and giving pleasure. Finding and voicing limits can often times be the most daunting part of the BDSM lifestyle. It [...]

4, May | Leave a comment

Book Review: 50 Shades of Curious by Bo Blaze

Fifty Shades of Curious is by Bo Blaze, a PCC-certified alternative life coach who specializes in alternative sexual relationships and non-traditional lifestyles. He is also well-known nationally as an expert in the BDSM lifestyle who has spoken at numerous events all over the country. With the popularity of the series “Fifty Shades of Grey”, Blaze [...]

30, April | 1 comment

Sex and Sexuality View All

How Giving a Blowjob Has Taught Me That Service and Pleasure Are One

I used to hate giving blow jobs. I am sure it could be argued that I still don’t love them, but the mind shift has certainly come a long way in the positive for KnyghtMare. My history with giving oral sex is one I’ve heard from a few of you. Your first experiences were not [...]

9, February | 13 comments

Ask lunaKM – I Want My Boyfriend to be More Dominant in Bed

Hello.. Umm I don’t know how to start this.. You see I’m trying to get my boyfriend to be more dominant in the bedroom. I understand the whole communication part and we communicate great.. About other things.. When I comes to sex and telling him what I like I afraid I might scare him. But, [...]

22, October | Leave a comment

My Time on the Edge: Exploring Rimming

(Disclosure: I first published this on ) My first experience with ass to mouth sex was a huge surprise. I was playing around with someone, and I said something to the effect of, “kiss my ass” as a way to disagree with something he said, and he rolled me over, pinned me down and [...]

11, June | 9 comments

Other Articles View All

Tips for Taking Care of Your BDSM and Sex Toys

Tips for Taking Care of Your BDSM and Sex Toys

From the Submissive Guide Newsletter 1/24/15 Most of us in the BDSM or D/s lifestyle love our toys. Some of us have chests, trunks and even entire rooms dedicated to our tools and toys. I know that KnyghtMare and I have lots of toys and the space they take up keeps growing with each new [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Domestics, Newsletter Archive, Play and Sex
BDSM Basics – What Your First Date Might Look Like

BDSM Basics – What Your First Date Might Look Like

Welcome back to the next part in the BDSM Basics series. In earlier episodes we figured out if we were kinky, what role we are, how to stay safe and how to find a partner. In this article we’ll talk about what your first date might look like. I’ll cover two different situations for a [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: BDSM Basics, Video Posts
DIY: Knife & Blood Play

DIY: Knife & Blood Play

Trigger Warning: Blood play, cutting, blood and knives When I first filled out my BDSM checklist, I felt entirely insufficient. For every one activity that I really wanted to try, there were two that I said I never wanted to try. There seemed to be infinitely more zeros (which indicated hard limits) than threes (which [...]

3 comments Posted by andyiccee | Posted in: Play and Sex, Safety
Sub Drop Madness – Submissive Meditation Monday

Sub Drop Madness – Submissive Meditation Monday

I’m devoting this Monday to meditation, reflection and devotion to submission. I hope to select topics that will get you thinking differently about some part of your life or submission and then just maybe grow a little bit further. If you have ideas for topics that might work for a Meditation Monday, please email me. With [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Play and Sex
What is a Fetish?

What is a Fetish?

This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Fetish. An object of extreme or irrational reverence or devotion. The often pathological displacement of erotic or libidinal interest sufficient to stimulate actions of worship. Often regarded as a fixation of the mind [...]

Leave a comment Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: BDSM Glossary
How to Be Responsive During Play Without Being Demanding

How to Be Responsive During Play Without Being Demanding

“Oh yeah, that feels good, right here. Spank me there! Harder! No, not like that. Make it sting! Oh oh ouchie, back off a bit man!” For some of you, that stream of words is cringe-worthy. Who’s driving the scene if the bottom is assaulting the Top with all the direction?  A submissive driving the [...]

4 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Play and Sex
Fifty Shades of Grey, Consent and the Media’s Representation of Kink

Fifty Shades of Grey, Consent and the Media’s Representation of Kink

We all knew that the Fifty Shades of Grey movie would bring about a conversation regarding BDSM, non-vanilla relationships, and the nature of consent between adult sexual partners.  I read an article discussing the “impact” of the film, and it got me thinking. In the interests of full disclosure, I will tell you that I [...]

Leave a comment Posted by pinksubgeek | Posted in: BDSM Basics, Community
CC 2.0 Photo by Glang Bul

Feeling down after a play session?

One weekend, my Dominant and I had a number of really great scenes. No matter what we were doing, we were deeply connected to each other and it was blissful. I can’t even remember what we did but I remember the high I felt I was soaring on no matter what else we were doing [...]

1 comment Posted by moonlight | Posted in: Play and Sex
When He Slapped Me: My Impressions of Face Slapping

When He Slapped Me: My Impressions of Face Slapping

First published on I wrote this almost 5 years ago and am sharing it again with you here. As with everything BDSM has to offer, there are what are considered light play activities and those that are intense, even on the edge or taboo. Face slapping is considered the latter.  Two years ago I [...]

4 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Play and Sex

Am I Little or What? Discovering the Types of Littles

Like in the BDSM lifestyle, there’s a lot of different labels and terminology when it comes to the world of age players, littles, adult babies, and diaper lovers. Like most people, one person usually doesn’t just fit one definition and there tends to be a blending of labels, which is totally cool because I fully [...]

6 comments Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: BDSM Glossary, Beginner Basics, Community

Meet Kinky People This Summer! Learn What to Expect in Our Guide toYour First Munch