Mentoring, self-help and submissive exploration

Play and Sex

Explore the different ways to serve during those BDSM playtime moments.

BDSM Basics View All

Am I Little or What? Discovering the Types of Littles

Like in the BDSM lifestyle, there’s a lot of different labels and terminology when it comes to the world of age players, littles, adult babies, and diaper lovers. Like most people, one person usually doesn’t just fit one definition and there tends to be a blending of labels, which is totally cool because I fully [...]

3, February | 5 comments

BDSM Basics – How Do I Find Someone to Play With?

It’s the burning question on our lips now isn’t it? Through the earlier posts we’ve learned whether you are kinky, what role or roles we might enjoy and how to stay safe when exploring kink. So it makes sense that you now want to know how to find someone to experiment with and maybe have [...]

19, January | 3 comments

BDSM Basics: Staying Safe with SSC

In my earlier BDSM Basics videos you learned about being kinky and what roles you might like to try while you explore the great big world of BDSM. Today I’m going to talk about safety. Every new thing you try is full of risks, some you are willing to take and others you aren’t. So [...]

15, December | Leave a comment

Sex and Sexuality View All

How Giving a Blowjob Has Taught Me That Service and Pleasure Are One

I used to hate giving blow jobs. I am sure it could be argued that I still don’t love them, but the mind shift has certainly come a long way in the positive for KnyghtMare. My history with giving oral sex is one I’ve heard from a few of you. Your first experiences were not [...]

9, February | 10 comments

Ask lunaKM – I Want My Boyfriend to be More Dominant in Bed

Hello.. Umm I don’t know how to start this.. You see I’m trying to get my boyfriend to be more dominant in the bedroom. I understand the whole communication part and we communicate great.. About other things.. When I comes to sex and telling him what I like I afraid I might scare him. But, [...]

22, October | Leave a comment

My Time on the Edge: Exploring Rimming

(Disclosure: I first published this on ) My first experience with ass to mouth sex was a huge surprise. I was playing around with someone, and I said something to the effect of, “kiss my ass” as a way to disagree with something he said, and he rolled me over, pinned me down and [...]

11, June | 8 comments

Other Articles View All

CC 2.0 Photo by Glang Bul

Feeling down after a play session?

One weekend, my Dominant and I had a number of really great scenes. No matter what we were doing, we were deeply connected to each other and it was blissful. I can’t even remember what we did but I remember the high I felt I was soaring on no matter what else we were doing [...]

Leave a comment Posted by moonlight | Posted in: Play and Sex
When He Slapped Me: My Impressions of Face Slapping

When He Slapped Me: My Impressions of Face Slapping

First published on I wrote this almost 5 years ago and am sharing it again with you here. As with everything BDSM has to offer, there are what are considered light play activities and those that are intense, even on the edge or taboo. Face slapping is considered the latter.  Two years ago I [...]

4 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Play and Sex
After “Red” : How to Manage the Aftermath When You’ve Used Your Safeword

After “Red” : How to Manage the Aftermath When You’ve Used Your Safeword

from the Submissive Guide Newsletter 11/1/14 Your safeword is your lifeline for play. It is a way to express you’ve reached a limit, whether that is a physical limit or an emotional one. The couples that play with safewords know that there is an often unspoken importance in only using it when it is necessary [...]

No Stupid (Sex Toy) Questions:  Episode 2 – Butt Stretching

No Stupid (Sex Toy) Questions: Episode 2 – Butt Stretching

Question 2: So I kinda would like to explore bigger toys in my butt, but you hear all these myths. Like, if you go too big you’ll make your butthole so loose you become incontinent and other gross stuff. Is this true? No. In fact, just like the vagina, the muscles in the anus are [...]

Leave a comment Posted by Rayne Millaray | Posted in: Play and Sex
CC 2.0 Photo by Visit i3Detroit

Flogging: Getting Started

We sat in a friend’s living room as they showed us their collection of floggers. Each one a little different from the last. Some with more weight in the handle, some with thin tails, and still others were fluffy. This is what my introduction to kinky toys looked like. Floggers are a very common first [...]

Leave a comment Posted by moonlight | Posted in: Play and Sex
How to Ask for More Playtime

How to Ask for More Playtime

As a submissive, I understand how hard it is to face your Dominant and ask them to play, or have sex or what have you. When I was new I thought that asking for these things was a boundary you just didn’t cross. My belief that the Dominant was supposed to do things to you [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Play and Sex
photo by Nattu ( CC BY 2.0

How Far Should You Go On a First Date?

from the Submissive Guide Newsletter 9/6/14 When I was a novice submissive I was single and searching for a Dominant to be my playmate, my partner and my lover. I explored all the places online that existed at the time, many that do not exist now or have been replaced by better sites. I was, in [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Play and Sex, Relationships
Picture by tequilarose

The Best Resources for Littles, Adult Babies, and Diaper Lovers

About a month ago, I got an email from a reader telling me that she and her dominant are interested in the Daddy/little girl lifestyle and asked me if I knew of any other online resources other than my previous articles that have appeared here on Submissive Guide. Sadly to say, I didn’t have many [...]

Leave a comment Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: BDSM Glossary, Research Pages

What an Alpha BabyGirl Is to Me

The more I research BDSM the more I feel at home in the community – I realize that aspects of myself that I always thought were weird and unacceptable are permissive and actually quite normal here. The more I research the more I realize that I epitomize some of these roles without trying. When I [...]

4 comments Posted by andyiccee | Posted in: BDSM Glossary, Mindset
Sub Drop From Afar

Sub Drop From Afar

Sub drop is the feeling of hopelessness and depression that can follow the extreme rush of endorphins during intense play or sex if the sub is not cared for appropriately afterwards. Care varies from person to person – some of us need to be held and cuddled and praised and iced or hot packed accordingly, [...]

2 comments Posted by andyiccee | Posted in: Play and Sex, Stay Safe

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