Mentoring, self-help and submissive exploration

Beginner Basics

This topic is great for those newer to submission and those looking to learn about submission from a general point of view.

Male Submission View All

Ask the Readers – Where Do Male Submissives Go For Information?

Hi readers! Every so often I have a question from someone that deserves different viewpoints and so I’m sharing it with you. Please give your advice to this submissive and be kind.  Being male in a field of females is awkward.  Where do hetro-male subs go for info??? My answer would be that much of what is pointed to female submissives works for male submissives also, just change the pronouns. But are there specific websites, forums or discussion groups that cater to male submissives who [...]

7, December | 4 comments

Book Review: Slave-ography by Slave Patrick

Awhile ago, I had a couple of male s-types contact me and I replied to one of their comments saying something along the lines how I wish there was a book for the male s-types like there are for female submissives. There are tons of books and blogs, and whatever else out there geared towards female [...]

1, December | Leave a comment

Male submission – Financial Domination

Financial Domination is an area of BDSM which often elicits strong opinions. With other BDSM activities such as spanking and bondage, at some point after the Safe, Sane, and Consensual scene is over there is no damage done and things are typically physically back to the way they were. However, if a sub’s money is [...]

23, July | 14 comments

Mindset View All

Strong and Submissive: Exploring the Phenomenon of Strong Female Submissives

By Sensuous Sadie If I had a nickel for every submissive who hit on me, I could open my own dungeon. The real bummer about the whole thing is that I’m submissive myself. Oh sure, I top now and then, but when it comes down to it, my BDSM orientation is submissive. So, you ask, [...]

6, May | 4 comments

Feeling Like a Failure as a Slave

Dinner time at our house is 6 PM. In my opinion, it’s like the perfect time. Not too early, gives Daddy and I a couple of hours to catch up on our TV shows or to watch a movie and afterwards gives us time to do our own thing before bed. I’m usually very good [...]

3, May | 2 comments

Busyness, Why Do We Think It Adds Value?

This isn’t one of my usual posts that have some sort of resolution in the conclusion because this is something I’m working through and this post is created at least in part as a portion of the out-working. With this in mind, I’m looking forward to your feedback in the comments! This is something that’s [...]

21, January | 7 comments

Online Submission View All

Cyber Realities

This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. In many ways this seems like a contradiction in terms. However, it cannot be overlooked that the advent of the Internet has opened the access into the BDSM community in ways completely incomprehensible [...]

1, May | 1 comment

Ask lunaKM – Is he Ignoring me or has he moved on?

Dear LunaKMI am a novice sub who found her  first Master about a 5 weeks ago.  We live about 200 miles apart and have mainly instant messaged, telephoned and skyped.  About 3 weeks ago we met for the first time and it was wonderful.  He asked for my submission about a week into the relationship [...]

11, August | 1 comment

Being a Little in a Long Distance Relationship

The other day I got an email from a reader who had a question about being in a long distance relationship with his little and wanting to know some ideas on how to make that work. Like usual when I get a question from a reader, I got super excited(because I do love hearing from [...]

29, July | 11 comments

Other Articles View All

The Importance of Being Your Own Person

The Importance of Being Your Own Person

Before I moved to Germany, Daddy and I had a lot of serious discussions. We talked about culture shock and homesickness, things I would have to deal with after moving here, all that kind of stuff. There’s one conversation in particular I remember. I asked Him if I would have to give up all my [...]

Leave a comment Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: Beginner Basics
The Art of Apology: The Importance of Apologizing

The Art of Apology: The Importance of Apologizing

We all know that communicating well with our partners is one of the most important (and often hardest) aspects of keeping a relationship healthy. It’s something that’s talked about a lot in the BDSM community when we talk about meeting our wants and needs, as well as in the vanilla community where we address building [...]

Leave a comment Posted by kallista | Posted in: Beginner Basics
Ask lunaKM: What are my limits?

Ask lunaKM: What are my limits?

Dear lunaKM, I am a sub that is very new to the BDSM scene. I know a little bit, but I’m quite unfamiliar with a lot. Recently, I met someone online that immediately recognized me as a sub, and I would love to impress him. He asked my what my limits are, and what I’m [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything, Beginner Basics
Ask Submissive Guide: Ready to Get Kinky

Ask Submissive Guide: Ready to Get Kinky

So I am not satisfied with my boyfriend. I don’t know how to go about telling him, I want to dominated. I am not responding to vanilla sex anymore, and need more. I need/want him to be domineering, to know he will take care of my wants and needs. We have had bumps in the [...]

Leave a comment Posted by Kayla Lords | Posted in: Ask Anything, Beginner Basics
Recognizing Sub Rebound (Sub Drop)

Recognizing Sub Rebound (Sub Drop)

This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Submissive Rebound is a reaction that occurs in most submissives at some point in their relationship with a Dominant. It manifests in feelings of depression, heightened anxiety and a sensation of ‘distance’ between [...]

Leave a comment Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: Beginner Basics
Picture by tequilarose

Learning Your Way Around the Kitchen-Copycat Ikea Meatballs

When I lived in the US, I heard of this magical store, Ikea. Not only did it have all kinds of home furnishings and accessories, but it also had a restaurant where you could eat Swedish meatballs. Unfortunately, I didn’t live anywhere near a store, so I never got the chance to visit one. Fast [...]

Leave a comment Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Domestics, Personal Growth, Service
Reacting to Change in D/s Dynamics

Reacting to Change in D/s Dynamics

I just don’t feel very dedicated to being submissive. I uttered the admittance with a growing sense of disappointment in myself. I want to, but I just don’t feel it It was during the Easter holiday, over Skype chat. My Dom was at work, and I knew it was unfair to tell her at that [...]

2 comments Posted by kallista | Posted in: Beginner Basics
Book Review: Spanking for Lovers by Janet Hardy

Book Review: Spanking for Lovers by Janet Hardy

A couple of weeks on Facebook, Janet Hardy (co-author of several amazing books including The Ethical Slut and The New Bottoming Book), asked for people who are interested in reviewing her new book, Spanking for Lovers and I had a total fangirl moment. I swear, if it had been in person, I would have been [...]

4 comments Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Reviews
How Often Have You Said: “I Don’t Know What’s Expected of Me, But I’d Like To”?

How Often Have You Said: “I Don’t Know What’s Expected of Me, But I’d Like To”?

from the Submissive Guide Newsletter 8/29/15 What ARE you expected to do and know as a submissive? Well, for many who are just starting out, the answer really is not much. But that’s not the kind of answer you accept out of me, right? There’s more to it, isn’t there? Of course there always is, [...]

Ask lunaKM – Where Can I Go to Talk to Someone about Submission?

Ask lunaKM – Where Can I Go to Talk to Someone about Submission?

Is there any service out there that you can talk to a live person and go through some things that are fairly new to me in real time like right now… not necessarily the paid chat but just someone to ask questions and see if what I’m doing is normal…well somewhat normal. Hi there! I [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything, Beginner Basics

Curious About Submissive Guide eBooks? We have several Pay What You Want titles: Check Them Out!