Mentoring, self-help and submissive exploration

Articles for tag 'Safety'

Articles

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Submission Isn’t Easy-Nor for Your Convenience

How hard is it to do something that your dominant, the one person you love and trust completely, has asked that you don’t want to do? Tequilarose shares her thoughts on the sometimes struggle to submit.

9 comments Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: Personal Growth
A Lesson on The Importance of Online Safety from Kitty Thomas’ “Tender Mercies”

A Lesson on The Importance of Online Safety from Kitty Thomas’ “Tender Mercies”

There are a lot of risks that comes with meeting people online. Tequilarose shares a lesson she picked up from reading “Tender Mercies” by Kitty Thomas about online safety and abusive situations.

Leave a comment Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Safety

Hitting the Wall During Play – Limit’s Edge

What does it mean to hit the wall? Let’s explore how deep the rabbit hole goes and become more aware of our own limits during play.

Leave a comment Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: Play and Sex, Safety
31 Days of Submissive Journaling – Day 15: Online Security and Anonymity, or Should You Share?

31 Days of Submissive Journaling – Day 15: Online Security and Anonymity, or Should You Share?

Don’t trust anyone. The internet is a scary place. I’m going to share with you by best advice on protecting yourself online when you create a blog and an online presence. Don’t create a blog without it!

About Punishment

Punishment is one of those areas which is not what it seems. Before you can develop tools or methods of punishment you have to look at the concepts behind the issue itself.

2 comments Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: Beginner Basics
When Play is No Longer Play: Recognizing Abuse in a BDSM Relationship

When Play is No Longer Play: Recognizing Abuse in a BDSM Relationship

I am going to tell you, on no uncertain terms that if your dominant is hurting you out of anger this is abusive.

8 comments Posted by andyiccee | Posted in: Relationships, Safety
DIY: Knife & Blood Play

DIY: Knife & Blood Play

Knife and Blood play, as you can probably guess, comes with a lot of intrinsic danger – so before embarking in this type of play, you need to make sure that you have an adequate safety kit ready.

6 comments Posted by andyiccee | Posted in: Play and Sex, Safety
Sub Drop From Afar: Managing Sub Drop in a Long Distance Relationship

Sub Drop From Afar: Managing Sub Drop in a Long Distance Relationship

Sub drop is the feeling of hopelessness and depression that can follow the extreme rush of endorphins during intense play or sex if the sub is not cared for appropriately afterwards. Care varies from person to person – some of us need to be held and cuddled and praised and iced or hot packed accordingly, [...]

3 comments Posted by andyiccee | Posted in: Play and Sex, Safety

Consent is Key: SSC and RACK

From the Submissive Guide Newsletter 4/19/14 The Birth of Safe, Sane and Consensual Historically, David Stein is the person who first coined the phrase in 1983 for the Gay Male SM Activists Group that he co-founded. It was then used as the slogan in the SM Rights contingent of the Gay Rights march to the [...]

2 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: BDSM Fundamentals, Newsletter Archive

RACK: The Risk Acceptable Safety Mantra

I’ve spoken to you about Safe, Sane and Consensual and about how it is the first safety mantra that people adopt as they learn about BDSM and kink relationships. Most BDSM munch groups around the world use SSC to define the play that is acceptable and how they prefer to present themselves to the vanilla [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Play and Sex

Understanding Safe Words for Safe Play

The adventures in the bedroom or dungeon are a lot of fun and you can get lost in the intense responses and pleasure during these moments. It is not without it’s own challenge of safety and communication. When the intensity of activities go up it’s not uncommon for tops and bottoms alike to lose the [...]

4 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Play and Sex

Personal Safety Mantra: Safe Sane and Consensual (SSC)

When a novice submissive first learns about BDSM or D/s power exchange it can be a scary place. The first thing I like to help these novices learn is about safety mantras, particularly the widely accepted Safe, Sane and Consensual or SSC. What is SSC? It’s a credo that people in the BDSM community use [...]

2 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: BDSM Fundamentals, Safety
Submitting in a Long Distance Relationship: The Big Meet

Submitting in a Long Distance Relationship: The Big Meet

As I mentioned in my introduction to this series, online submission is a bit of a hot-button among D/s practitioners. There are a lot of great arguments for why it doesn’t work, and for each of those, there’s an equally strong counterargument for why it’s a perfectly valid arrangement; but chances are, unless you’re submitting [...]

5 comments Posted by kallista | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Relationships, Safety
Male submission – Financial Domination

Male submission – Financial Domination

Financial Domination is an area of BDSM which often elicits strong opinions. With other BDSM activities such as spanking and bondage, at some point after the Safe, Sane, and Consensual scene is over there is no damage done and things are typically physically back to the way they were. However, if a sub’s money is [...]

24 comments Posted by ted_subby | Posted in: Male Submission, Relationships
Is My Dominant a Bully?

Is My Dominant a Bully?

I have been in my first D/s relationship for the past 6 months.My Sir and I don’t live together yet but that is the plan for the future, although I am with him whenever I am not working.  There are a few things that are bothering me and I would like to know if these [...]

4 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything, Relationships, Safety
You Could Be in Danger While in Top/Sub Space – Learn How to Protect Yourself

You Could Be in Danger While in Top/Sub Space – Learn How to Protect Yourself

I first published this in Society of Janus’ Bi-monthly newsletter, I thought I’d share it with you as well. From the Submissive Guide Newsletter 4/6/13 Exploring kink is full of exciting experiences and hormonal roller coasters. We manipulate adrenaline and endorphins to give us a pleasurable experience during play. Often without knowing how these hormones [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Newsletter Archive, Play and Sex
Do You Make These Mistakes? Avoid Outing a Fellow BDSM Lifestyler

Do You Make These Mistakes? Avoid Outing a Fellow BDSM Lifestyler

There are a few “sins” in the world of BDSM; ignoring a safe word and touching that which does not belong to you are a few examples.  But, while both of these are bad, one might be able to look at a different point of view.  Someone may ignore a safe word because their scene [...]

1 comment Posted by LaneyDoll | Posted in: Community
Your Responsibilities in Play – In and Out of a Relationship

Your Responsibilities in Play – In and Out of a Relationship

From the Submissive Guide Newsletter 3/2/13 Our responsibilities as a submissive are important to be aware of. I’ve said a number of times in other articles that often novice submissives feel that once they are in a relationship they don’t have any responsibilities at all. That is far from true. Does that then mean that [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Newsletter Archive, Play and Sex
Ask lunaKM – Quick Fire Answers on Being a Great Submissive, Guilt, Shame and More

Ask lunaKM – Quick Fire Answers on Being a Great Submissive, Guilt, Shame and More

My question is how do i learn to be great for a Master seeing that i am a man. Women have so many advantages to pleasing their Master than i do. Can you give me some pointers? Thank you. I’m not really sure what advantages that are uniquely female that don’t have a male counterpart. [...]

3 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything, Play and Sex, Relationships
Male Submission – Foot Fetish

Male Submission – Foot Fetish

In this part 3 of my series of articles about Male Submission on The Submissive Guide, I discuss the role of a foot fetish. There are a whole lot of guys who have a fetish for feet, and while there are women who also have a foot fetish it is by far more prevalent with [...]

11 comments Posted by ted_subby | Posted in: Male Submission, Play and Sex
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