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Browse: Home / safe

safe

What NOT to Share on Your Online Profile

By lunaKM on February 13, 2010

This video post is about what not to share on your online profile. We all have one somewhere. FetLife being all the rage right now, but also we have alt.com, collarme.com, bondage.com and others where we place ads and identity profiles up to get people interested. This interest can be friends or relationship related; it [...]

Posted in Safety, Video Posts | Tagged abuse, Alt.com, Bondage, Bondage.com, CollarMe, cons, danger, dangers, dating, depression, email, false sense of security, family, fetlife, friends, information, internet, online, Online dating, online profiles, profile safety, relationship, rt, safe, Safety, security, Service, share, share photos, sharing, support, tips | 3 Responses

Up in Flames: The Basics of Fireplay

By Guest Author on January 11, 2010

This is another guest post for the BDSM Play Feature here on SubmissiveGuide. This post about Fire Play is by Gwendolyn. Enjoy! I have always been a fire bug and am a volunteer fire fighter. So when I became interested in BDSM and heard about fire play it was definitely top of my list of [...]

Posted in BDSM Basics | Tagged amazon.com, basics, BDSM, bdsm play, bdsm play feature, book, bottom, cons, danger, Dom, Domme, email, event, events, experience, feature series, fetlife, fire cupping, fire drumming, fire fleshing, fire flogging, fire play, fire whipping, focus, friends, friendships, guest post, Gwendolyn, health, information, learned, leather, love, m/s, online, opinion, pain tolerance, play, poly, questions, review, risk, rt, safe, Safety, scene, Service, single, slave, stress, submissive, support, toy, toys, trust, websites, writing | 1 Response

The Ins and Outs of Fetishes

The Ins and Outs of Fetishes

By lunaKM on December 16, 2009

“I have a fetish for wool socks, I just love them!” “I have a fetish for corsets, I can’t get off without thinking of them!” One of these statements is a sure sign of a fetish; the other is a misuse of the term. Sure this is a poor example. How many times have you [...]

Posted in Playtime | Tagged BDSM, blogs, body parts, cons, corsets, desires, development, Dom, dominant, favorite, fetishes, fetishism, fetishist, foot fetish, gender, hands, health, latex, learning, leather, love, obsession, partialism, piercing, play, preference, relationship, role play, rt, safe, sex, sexual fetishes, sexual fetishism, share, size, speech, standing, stimulus, stress, submissive, understanding, what is a fetish, worship | 1 Response

SkylerPet’s Helpful Holiday Hints

SkylerPet’s Helpful Holiday Hints

By Guest Author on December 9, 2009

This post is another guest post by Skylerpet. You can read her other posts here. She’s wants to help us all get through the holidays with less stress. Here’s some tips to help you. If you have other tips for holiday stress, please leave them in the comments! With the holiday season in full swing, [...]

Posted in Service | Tagged 24/7, bath, book, chat, christmas, Christmas tips, clean, D/s, dates, disposable, email, family, family visits, guest post, hands, health, help, holiday, holiday hints, holiday stress, learned, lifestyle, pet play, play, rt, safe, Safety, share, skylerpet, stress, submissive, tips, wants | Leave a response

Chat Night Transcript for Speaking Submissively

Chat Night Transcript for Speaking Submissively

By lunaKM on December 8, 2009

This chat was held on December 2nd, 2009. ~lunaKM> So tonight I wanted to talk about speech and how the way we communicate can impact our submission. Nia> tonight’s topic really struck a chord with me angel> same here ~lunaKM> I’ve been doing a bit of non-scientific research of my own when I am out [...]

Posted in Views & More... | Tagged advice, chat, chat night, community, control, D/s, decisions, discussion, Dom, dominant, Dominant bashing, Domme, experience, family, fear, friends, gossip, grace, help, Impact, information, learned, natural, needs, online, opinion, play, questions, recovery, relationship, requests, risk, rt, safe, serving, sex, share, sharing, size, sorry, speaking submissively, speech, submission, submissive, suggestions, support, switch, switching, tall, transcript, trust, wants | 3 Responses

What are Dress Protocols?

What are Dress Protocols?

By lunaKM on December 4, 2009

I had a question sent to me via YouTube asking me about for information about dress protocols. I can only tell you what I am familiar with, so be aware that there are many many other forms of dress protocols and just as many (if not more) reasons behind them. I’m going to assume that [...]

Posted in Rituals and Routines | Tagged ask me, BDSM, clothing, Dom, dominant, dominants, dress, event, grooming, information, makeup, play, poses, preference, preferences, protocol, purpose, relationship, rt, rules, safe, sex, share, shaving, short, submissive, symbols, wants, what to wear | 6 Responses

Submissive and Slave: A Personal View

Submissive and Slave: A Personal View

By Rayne on November 11, 2009

This post was written by Rayne. You can follow her twitter for active and interesting conversation. I’m pretty big on book definitions. So for me, the word “submissive” has always been an adjective describing a personality trait. When I got involved in BDSM, it became, for me, a heading, of sorts, describing a group of [...]

Posted in Submission | Tagged 24/7, BDSM, blogs, book, bottom, choice, communication, community, cons, control, definitions, desires, Dom, dominant, dominants, guest post, IRC, labels, lifestyle, limits, m/s, masochist, needs, owned, perfect world, play, play parties, power exchange, progress, protocol, Rayne, relationship, Relationships, review, rt, rules, safe, safe words, scene, series, Service, sex, short, slave, submission, submissive, toy, transparency, twitter | 1 Response

Best BDSM Fiction for Hot Steamy Nights

By lunaKM on November 2, 2009

I love reading BDSM fiction, erotica and other service books. I broke my kinky teeth on the Story of O so I can’t ignore it on this list, but it’s not the best of the best. I’d like to offer up the books that I love and enjoy to read; most of which I like [...]

Posted in Views & More... | Tagged amazon.com, BDSM, bdsm books, bdsm fiction, book, book list, books, erotica, kinky, love, play, punishment, rt, safe, series, Service, slave, submissive, toy | 4 Responses

Help Submissive Guide Raise $1000 for NLA-I DVP for National Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Help Submissive Guide Raise $1000 for NLA-I DVP for National Domestic Violence Awareness Month

By lunaKM on October 2, 2009

It’s important to have a cause you believe in, for me it’s the National Leather Association-International Domestic Violence Project. Their cause to bring awareness of the differences in BDSM and abuse as well to help victims of domestic violence in BDSM-related relationships find assistance and get help really provide a service that you can’t get [...]

Posted in BDSM Basics | Tagged abuse, amazon.com, assistance, BDSM, charity fundraiser, community, cons, dates, Dom, domestic violence awareness, domestic violence awareness month, domestic violence information, domestic violence project, donations, drawing, email, event, giveaway, help, information, kink community, leather, leather communities, national domestic violence awareness month, national leather association, newsletter, NLA-I DVP, RACK, relationship, Relationships, Resources, rt, safe, Service, size, spread the word, submissive, support, training, twitter, value | 5 Responses

Chat Night Transcript From Sub Space and Sub Drop Talk

By lunaKM on September 24, 2009

<~luna[KM]> Now I’d like to hear from everyone… have you experienced subspace? If you don’t know if you have, it’s okay. <selene1123> i’m pretty new…so i think i have but am not sure <slavelauren> i have <radiogirl> I most definitely have <pet_rain> i’m not sure  i think i would like a clear definition i’v heard [...]

Posted in Views & More... | Tagged 24/7, aftercare, balance, bath, chat, chat night, comfort, communication, connection, cons, definitions, Dom, Dominance, dress, email, emotional state, emotions, endorphins, experience, focus, happiness, healing, help, limits, love, munch, normal, play, PMS, relationship, Relationships, ritual, rt, safe, safewords, scene, separation, serving, share, shower, slave, sorry, spirit, spiritual, stress, Study, sub drop, sub space, submissive chat, subspace, tall, transcript, writing | 1 Response

Exploring Your Place in BDSM Play

Exploring Your Place in BDSM Play

By lunaKM on September 23, 2009

Submission during play can be overwhelming. How do you understand what you might like? What about the buzz words of subspace and sub drop? One of Submissive Guide’s goals is to help novice submissives understand BDSM and their place in it. To help you begin your exploration I’ve put together a list of the posts [...]

Posted in BDSM Basics | Tagged aftercare, BDSM, bdsm checklist, bdsm play, checklist, comfort, cons, consensual, D/s, development, Dom, dominant, dominants, help, journey, novice, online, play, Playtime, questions, RACK, relationship, Relationships, risk, risk aware, rt, safe, safewords, sane, scene, share, single, SSC, sub drop, sub frenzy, sub space, submission, submissive, subspace, toy, toybag, trust | Leave a response

The Safety Disguise of Safewords

The Safety Disguise of Safewords

By lunaKM on September 21, 2009

I’ve always believed that safewords are only good if you know how to use them. Good ole communication is great for things like numb limbs, an itch you can’t reach or a bathroom break.  Submissive Guide is here for novices and it’s always good to teach about safewords and recommend that you have one. In [...]

Posted in Safety | Tagged acceptance, advice, bath, BDSM, bdsm play, beginning bdsm, blogs, book, communication, cons, consensual, danger, desires, Dom, dominant, information, kajira, learned, needs, negotiation, novice, novices, partners, play, relationship, Relationships, risk, rt, safe, Safety, safewords, sane, security, share, stress, submissive, trust | 2 Responses

Strengths and Misconceptions of Kajira

Strengths and Misconceptions of Kajira

By Guest Author on September 16, 2009

This is another guest post by dina of kajiradreams. She continues her thoughts on Gor and the life of a kajira. You can also read her thoughts on what it’s like to be an owned kajira. The strengths of a kajira and the misconceptions of what a kajira is and does. And what strengths better [...]

Posted in Submission | Tagged book, books, comfort, commitment, cons, control, decisions, desires, Dom, dominant, dreams, emotions, fantasy, fear, female, Gor, Gorean Lifestyle, guest post, hands, help, honesty, ideals, journey, kajira, lifestyle, love, misconceptions of Gor, needs, obedience, owned, play, player, purpose, rt, safe, series, sex, slave, sorry, spirit, standing, strengths of kajira, submission, submissive, switch, tall, trust, understanding, value, wants | 6 Responses

Assualt is NOT okay

By lunaKM on September 5, 2009

This week’s video post is about an issue that needs more awareness. I had someone ask me for some advice through my email the other day and it went something like this: I just started exploring my kinky side and I’ve only shared it with a few other people. One person that found out started [...]

Posted in Safety, Video Posts | Tagged abuse, advice, ask me, assistance, assistance programs, BDSM, cons, consensual, danger, Dom, domestic violence awareness, domestic violence awareness month, domestic violence project, email, family, fear, help, kinky, kinky side, leather, national domestic violence awareness month, national leather association, needs, NLA-I DVP, relationship, Relationships, rt, safe, Service, share, submission, submissive, support, value | 5 Responses

Nonverbal Ways to Safeword

Nonverbal Ways to Safeword

By lunaKM on September 2, 2009

At the beginning of this blog I wrote about safewords. Just a reminder that a safeword is a signal that ends BDSM play and usually negotiated before play.  It’s an excellent starting point but I left a part of it out. There will be occasions during BDSM play where you will be unable to speak. [...]

Posted in BDSM Basics | Tagged BDSM, bdsm play, bottom, clean, communication, daddy, gags, grace, m/s, newsletter, nonverbal clues, play, restraints, ritual, rt, safe, safe objects, safe words, safewords, scene, Service, sister, slave, stress, submissive, wants | 5 Responses

Now Available: The Spanking Series in E-Book!

Now Available: The Spanking Series in E-Book!

By lunaKM on September 1, 2009

If you have ever wondered how you can get the spanking you’ve always wanted but wasn’t sure how to ask for it, there is a book for you. I was just offered the chance to review a copy of How to Get the Spanking You Want: The Complete Guide to Asking for It, Getting It [...]

Posted in BDSM Basics, Views & More... | Tagged abuse, advice, Aria, blogs, book, books, bottom, caning, choice, clean, desires, discipline, Disciplined Feminist, Dom, e-book, emotions, experience, fear, focus, gender, gender roles, grace, help, history, learning, lifestyle, little girl, love, marks, real life, relationship, Resources, review, roles, rt, safe, series, share, size, spanking, spanking series, standing, tips, training, understanding, Variant Books, Vivian | Leave a response

The Basics of Negotiating a Scene

The Basics of Negotiating a Scene

By lunaKM on August 26, 2009

It can be very scary approaching a Dominant and asking them to play with you. The butterflies in your belly can make it very difficult to take that first step. It can be every worse if you two don’t negotiate the scene so that you get what you want out of it and s/he does [...]

Posted in Playtime | Tagged basics, BDSM, Bondage, bottom, boundaries, checklist, Dom, dominant, dominant partner, dress, event, experience, health, limits, marks, needs, negotiation, obedience, partners, play, player, relationship, roles, rt, safe, safe words, Safety, scene, sex, spanking, submissive, toy, toys | 1 Response

Using Playtime Check Ins Wisely

Using Playtime Check Ins Wisely

By lunaKM on August 14, 2009

A check in is where either partner provides clues as to their comfort, pain tolerance, pleasure level or other information during a scene or play session. Even the most experienced players continue to check in with their partners during play; it is a good practice to have. Whether you are playing with your partner or [...]

Posted in BDSM Basics, Playtime | Tagged body language, bottom, comfort, cons, Dom, dominant, emotional state, experience, implement, information, learning, negotiation, pain tolerance, partners, play, player, Playtime, questions, relationship, requests, rt, safe, scene, share, simple questions, submissive, subspace, tone of your voice, warnings | 2 Responses

First Meetings Done Safely

First Meetings Done Safely

By lunaKM on August 8, 2009

This week’s video post is on First Meetings Safety. When you are ready to meet your dream Dominant for the first time, what goes through your mind? Do you think about safety at all or do the nervousness and excitment overload your common sense? You may not think that safety is necessary for someone you’ve [...]

Posted in Safety, Video Posts | Tagged blind date, choice, choices, comfort, common sense, D/s, danger, dates, dating, Dom, dominant, dominants, dress, first meetings, information, munch, nervousness, normal, online, personal safety, play, questions, relationship, rt, safe, safe call, Safety, security, short, value, wants | Leave a response

Living with Kids While in the D/s Lifestyle

Living with Kids While in the D/s Lifestyle

By Guest Author on August 4, 2009

This is a guest post by Christian. He  is a switch male of the D/s lifestyle for the past 14 years. For my first post here I am going to write about something I get asked a fair bit. How does one raise kids in a D/s household? As one with several kids I thought [...]

Posted in Relationships, Social Norms | Tagged activities, BDSM, bdsm play, Bondage, Christian, community, D/s, decisions, dress, email, family, female, guest post, help, history, implement, internet, lifestyle, opinion, play, rt, safe, Service, sex, shopping, spanking, stress, submission, submissive, switch, tasks, trust | Leave a response

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