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Browse: Home / rules

rules

Why Safety is Preached to Novices and Why It’s Important to Know Anyway

By lunaKM on June 4, 2010

From the Submissive Guide Newsletter 3/3/10 Being in the BDSM community for any length of time you are likely to come across the common sermons of SSC, Safe Calls and First Meeting Safety. When you are novice in BDSM I’d encourage you to listen to these sermons and listen hard; they could protect you as [...]

Posted in Newsletter Archive, Safety | Tagged advice, basics, community, lifestyle, mantra, newsletter, novices, red flags, rules, safe call, Safety, SSC, submissive guide newsletter | 1 Response

The Top 30 Posts of 2009

By lunaKM on January 5, 2010

A year ago I started a small blog project called Submissive Guide. I wanted it to be an organized place where I could voice my opinions about submission, help novices discover who they are and explore BDSM through the written word. Since that time it has grown to so much more, including an e-book, a [...]

Posted in Views & More... | Tagged 2WBSP, 7 things, aftercare, Aria, bath, bathing, BDSM, bdsm checklist, bdsm lifestyle, best of 2009, best of submissiveguide, Best Submissive Blogs, blogs, book, bottom, checklist, choice, Dom, Dominance, dominant, dominants, e-book, guest post, help, how-to, human pet, journaling, kajira, learned, learning, lifestyle, masochist, newsletter, novice, novices, online, Online Submission, opinion, owned, pet play, pets, play, positions, resume, ritual, rituals, rosary, rt, rules, scene, Service, skylerpet, slave, slave training, sub drop, submission, submissive, submissive blogs, Submissive Positions, top posts, topping from the bottom, training, Training Resume, two dominants, websites, writing | Leave a response

The Impact of Velcro Collars on the Symbolism

By lunaKM on January 2, 2010

This week’s video post is about velcro collars. To submissives, a collar is one of the most important things they have. It is a symbol of their commitment, their service and their adoration of a special someone. In most situations, the offering or begging of a collar is not taken lightly. The weight of the [...]

Posted in Video Posts | Tagged begging, cheapen, collars, commitment, community, cons, disposable, Dom, dominant, dominants, experience, hands, Impact, important things, lifetime, marriage, mates, online, opinion, partners, relationship, Relationships, rt, rules, Service, submissive, symbolism, value, velcro collars | 2 Responses

Can You Separate BDSM and Sex?

Can You Separate BDSM and Sex?

By lunaKM on December 7, 2009

When Master and I get to play, it’s quite sexually charged. We find the play and the energy we swap as very sexual. Our play time usually ends in sex of some form. That’s just how we roll. Does it always have to be that way? Heck no! In fact, when I was casually playing, [...]

Posted in BDSM Basics, Sex and Sexuality | Tagged basics, BDSM, BDSM and sex, bdsm play, chat, decisions, discussion, Dom, dominant, energy, experience, intimacy, kinky, kinky side, negotiation, partners, play, play parties, relationship, rt, rules, scene, sex, sexual pleasure, standing, submissive, transcript, understanding | 4 Responses

What are Dress Protocols?

What are Dress Protocols?

By lunaKM on December 4, 2009

I had a question sent to me via YouTube asking me about for information about dress protocols. I can only tell you what I am familiar with, so be aware that there are many many other forms of dress protocols and just as many (if not more) reasons behind them. I’m going to assume that [...]

Posted in Rituals and Routines | Tagged ask me, BDSM, clothing, Dom, dominant, dominants, dress, event, grooming, information, makeup, play, poses, preference, preferences, protocol, purpose, relationship, rt, rules, safe, sex, share, shaving, short, submissive, symbols, wants, what to wear | 6 Responses

5 Ways to Express Your Gratitude to Your Dominant

5 Ways to Express Your Gratitude to Your Dominant

By lunaKM on November 13, 2009

With Thanksgiving (USA) just around the corner I thought it would be fitting to write about gratitude, and how to express your gratitude to the one you serve. Sure you can say thank you. That’s standard. I really hope you take every opportunity to say thank  you, but what if you want a few more [...]

Posted in Relationships, Rituals and Routines | Tagged bath, being thankful, development, Dom, Dominance, dominant, dynamic, focus, gratitude, happiness, help, kneeling, love, normal, online, play, relationship, Relationships, requests, ritual, rituals, rt, rules, Service, setting the table, sex, share, showing appreciation, skills, stress, submission, thanksgiving | 1 Response

Submissive and Slave: A Personal View

Submissive and Slave: A Personal View

By Rayne on November 11, 2009

This post was written by Rayne. You can follow her twitter for active and interesting conversation. I’m pretty big on book definitions. So for me, the word “submissive” has always been an adjective describing a personality trait. When I got involved in BDSM, it became, for me, a heading, of sorts, describing a group of [...]

Posted in Submission | Tagged 24/7, BDSM, blogs, book, bottom, choice, communication, community, cons, control, definitions, desires, Dom, dominant, dominants, guest post, IRC, labels, lifestyle, limits, m/s, masochist, needs, owned, perfect world, play, play parties, power exchange, progress, protocol, Rayne, relationship, Relationships, review, rt, rules, safe, safe words, scene, series, Service, sex, short, slave, submission, submissive, toy, transparency, twitter | 1 Response

Using Contracts to Negotiate a Relationship

Using Contracts to Negotiate a Relationship

By lunaKM on November 6, 2009

When you get married, you have to legally sign a document attesting to your decision to be married. The legal document can come in many forms but most have a brief section about what each party declares for the union, how they will treat each other and how commitment will be displayed (change of names [...]

Posted in Relationships, Rituals and Routines | Tagged Aria, BDSM, book, commitment, connection, cons, consensual, contracts, control, D/s, D/s contracts, Dom, Domme, dress, experience, IRC, learning, lifestyle, links, m/s, play, protocol, purpose, relationship, renewable contracts, ritual, rt, rules, short, slave, slavery, spirit, spiritual, structure, submission, switch | Leave a response

When Protocol Becomes Boring

When Protocol Becomes Boring

By lunaKM on October 21, 2009

Protocol. It can be a scary word if you are new to submission. In a relationship, it is likely that you will have some protocol established to control your behavior. So, what is protocol? Simply defined, protocol is the set of special rules that you follow for defined situations that remind you of your place [...]

Posted in Rituals and Routines | Tagged BDSM, bdsm fiction, book, books, communication, cons, control, Dom, dominant, essays, etiquette, event, experience, fantasy, focus, happiness, help, learned, leather, lifestyle, m/s, meditation, Mindset, normal, online, play, progress, protocol, RACK, relationship, review, ritual, routine, rt, rules, scene, sensuous, sex, stress, submission | 2 Responses

Chat Night Transcript From What is Service Talk

By lunaKM on October 15, 2009

lunaKM> So, first I’d like to get some impression about how new you are to submission. Could you please tell me how long you have been exploring submission and if you are in a relationship right now? lunaKM> hello aquamuse aquamuse> Hello, I’m new of course. eagerslut> I am in a relationship and just recently [...]

Posted in Views & More... | Tagged 24/7, activities, BDSM, book, bottom, calendar, chat, chat night, choice, choices, classes, clean, connection, cons, control, D/s, Dom, Dominance, dominant, dominants, Domme, dress, event, events, experience, focus, grace, growth, health, help, IRC, kneeling, learned, learning, lifestyle, love, m/s, marriage, mentor, natural, needs, newsletter, online, perfection, pride, purpose, relationship, requests, Resources, routine, rt, rules, separation, Service, serving, sex, sharing, shaving, shower, size, slave, stress, submission, submissive, submissive chat, surrender, tall, tasks, tips, training, transcript, writing | Leave a response

The Challenges of Being Kajira in Today’s Society

The Challenges of Being Kajira in Today’s Society

By Guest Author on September 18, 2009

Today’s guest post is by dina from Kajiradreams. You can also read her post on what it’s like to be an owned kajira and a kajira’s strengths and misconceptions. There is so many stereotypes, misconceptions of what a kajira is; what gor is; what the gorean lifestyle is; what a bdsm lifestyler looks like; what [...]

Posted in Submission | Tagged abuse, Aria, BDSM, bdsm lifestyle, challenges, chat, choice, choices, Christian, clean, cons, dreams, dress, dynamic, family, friends, Gor, Gorean Lifestyle, guest post, kajira, lifestyle, lifestyler, norms, opinion, owned, preference, preferences, questions, relationship, rt, rules, sex, share, single, slave, speech, stereotype, submissive, wants | 8 Responses

A Lesson in Control with Self-Punishment

A Lesson in Control with Self-Punishment

By lunaKM on August 10, 2009

Each and every day there is the chance to scew up and be disobedient. Luckily, most of us won’t break rules every single day but when we do we know that punishment will come swiftly and precisely. That is, unless you are an online submissive. Then there are a few other steps to having punishment [...]

Posted in Online Submission, Relationships | Tagged BDSM, blogs, book, calendar, chat, chat room, clothing, communication, control, Dom, dominant, email, essays, event, favorite, focus, growth, help, infraction, learning, lectures, limits, negotiation, obedience, online, online D/s, orgasms, public punishment, punishment, punishments, purpose, relationship, Relationships, rt, rules, self punishment ideas, self-discipline, sex, sexual chastisement, single, submission, submissive, tasks, trust, writing, writing essays | 6 Responses

Coming Clean: Admitting Your Disobedience

Coming Clean: Admitting Your Disobedience

By lunaKM on August 7, 2009

We all have those little voices in our head that tell us what to do. Sometimes it tries to convince us that our disobedience is okay.  The voices are very convincing at times and then we have guilt riding with us until we come clean. Perhaps you’ve heard these voices yourself: “Come on, he won’t [...]

Posted in Mindset, Relationships | Tagged choice, clean, coming clean, discipline, Dom, dominant, guilt, honesty, infraction, little voices, obedience, punishment, rt, rules, share, submission, submissive | 2 Responses

The Roundtable: D/s with Kids At Home

By lunaKM on July 29, 2009

Every so often I want to open up the blog for you to share and teach me on a topic that I don’t know a lot about. This is your chance to teach me and the other readers of this blog. I encourage you to comment, subscribe to the comments and keep coming back to [...]

Posted in Relationships, Roundtable Discussions, Social Norms | Tagged balance, BDSM, bdsm with kids, commitment, cons, D/s, event, explanations, explaning it to kids, interruptions, living D/s, play, power exchange, protect children, relationship, roles, rt, rules, share, toy, toys | 2 Responses

Handling an Addiction While in Service

Handling an Addiction While in Service

By lunaKM on July 28, 2009

Those of you who read my blog already know this, but for most of you this will be news. I have an addiction. At the end of last month I came to the realization that I am a binge eater and secret eater. I’m addicted to food and the way it makes me feel. While [...]

Posted in Health and Beauty, Service | Tagged addictions, choice, confession, cons, control, D/s, dynamic, eating disorder, emotions, experience, health, help, love, micromanagement, RACK, recovery, relationship, rt, rules, Service, submission, submissive, support | 9 Responses

Submissive Guide 2 Book Contest

Submissive Guide 2 Book Contest

By lunaKM on July 1, 2009

In celebration of 6 months of existence and almost 200 posts here on Submissive Guide I’m excited to announce my first contest! Since Submissive Guide is all about enhancing and growing in your submission the first giveaway will be for two books from Amazon.com. The books are Erotic Slavehood: A Miss Abernathy Omnibus by Christina [...]

Posted in Webmaster Notes | Tagged amazon.com, bdsm books, book, books, bottom, celebration, contest, Dom, dress, giveaway, m/s, Miss Abernathy, New Bottoming Book, RACK, rt, rules, slave, submission, submissive, twitter, winner | 3 Responses

How to Give Good Initial Interviews

How to Give Good Initial Interviews

By lunaKM on June 19, 2009

When you first start talking to a potential Dominant you go through an initial interview. A lot of times this is just a period where basic questions are asked and your answers help the Dominant gauge just how interested you are in them, how compatible you are with them and what your intelligence level is. [...]

Posted in BDSM Basics | Tagged Dom, dominant, dominants, dress, experience, good interviews, help, history, interview, limits, preference, preferences, questions, relationship, resume, rt, rules, short, speech, standing, stress, submissive, tips, understanding, wants, what to wear, worship, writing | 7 Responses

Know Your Manners when Visiting D/s Friends

By lunaKM on June 11, 2009

Accepting an invitation to visit friends that are into BDSM or the lifestyle can lead to a wonderful experience and the development of close friends. That is if you keep yourself aware of house rules and relationship dynamics.  Generally speaking, a couple of D/s friends are not going to drop their dynamic around you since [...]

Posted in Social Norms | Tagged attitude, BDSM, choice, clothing, comfort, common sense, D/s, d/s exposure, development, Dom, dominant, dress, dynamic, dynamics, etiquette, experience, family, friends, friendships, help, information, lifestyle, manners, play, protocol, relationship, rt, rules, shift, social etiquette, submissive, tips | Leave a response

Dominance as a Slave Training Tool for Better Submission

By lunaKM on June 4, 2009

When starting out in submission, there are a lot of roads you can choose and so many people direct novices to training and needing to be trained. Most of these novices then seek out a Master or Dominant to train them. This concept that the Dominant can teach the submissive more about surrender is a [...]

Posted in Mindset, Submission | Tagged advice, assistance, deeper submission, development, Dom, Dominance, dominant, dominants, experience, focus, fulfillment, help, information, journey, learning, love, mentor, novice, novices, questions, relationship, rt, rules, self-discovery, slave, slave training, submission, submissive, submissive training, submissive understanding, surrender, switch, training | Leave a response

Just Wait Till Your Father Gets Home: Telling Your Family

By lunaKM on May 30, 2009

This post is from Norische. She allows anyone to post her articles anywhere they will do some good. I could not come up with a better way to say what she does in this article. Please enjoy and comment! I’d love to hear if you have told your family and how it went. “So what [...]

Posted in BDSM Basics | Tagged abuse, acceptance, activities, BDSM, bdsm lifestyle, choice, choices, Christian, clean, comfort, communication, community, cons, consensual, control, Dom, dress, email, family, fear, floggers, friends, harnesses, help, implement, information, kink acceptance, kinky, leather, lifestyle, love, myths, natural, negotiation, normal, obedience, openness, opinion, outting yourself, paddles, play, progress, relationship, religion, rt, rules, safe, sane, sex, sharing, single, sister, slave, slavery, standing, stress, submissive, tall, telling family, toy, toys, understanding, whips, writing | 4 Responses

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